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Automotive April Fools' joke roundup [w/videos]

Happy April, everyone. And we all know what this first day of the month means: April Fools' Day. Today is a national holiday for pranksters with the Internet acting as a serious enabler, and it's always fun to see what kind of vivid imaginations exist out there in the automotive world. The abundance of fake news gets a little old as the day rolls on, but we did manage to get in a few chuckles thanks to a handful of major automakers and automotive news outlets that got into the pranking spirit this year
Some of our favorites this year includes Subaru showing what happens when you combine a bunch of rumors, a Corvette some may have already thought was a joke or Honda providing some in-car innovation circa the late 1980s. Honestly, we're still waiting for official confirmation from Mitsubishi that the recently introduced 2014 Mirage is an elaborate April Fools' joke using a failed design intended for the 1995 Geo Metro. We dug up as much "official" OEM foolishness we could find, as well as some of our other favorites, and posted them all below.

Volvo readying stretched next-gen S80 in lieu of 7 Series rival?

The debate about what direction to take perennially struggling Volvo has been raging for years. Should the Swedish marque go upscale and try to chase other European luxury brands, or should it stick to its safety-minded knitting? Should it adopt flashy new styling and a more overt performance bent, or keep it Scandinavian clean and responsible? Chinese parent brand Geely apparently has designs on making Volvo a full-fledged BMW rival - particularly in its homeland - including pushing for a range-topping 7 Series competitor. However, Volvo execs have been repeatedly pushing back on the idea. In fact, it's understood that this philosophical crisis contributed mightily to the high-profile departure of Stefan Jacoby, the company's CEO until the middle of 2012 (Jacoby has since rebounded to head international operations for General Motors).
There doesn't seem like any middle path in this debate, but that apparently isn't going to stop Volvo from trying. According to a sprawling Reuters report, Volvo will placate Geely chairman Li Shufu with a stretched and lux'd up version of the next S80. Yet Li still isn't completely satisfied, and he's said to be pushing for "a plusher and bigger model he calls the S100" to rival cars like the Audi A8. For the moment, it is not clear if the larger S80-based model will be a global offering, or just another one of China's many home-market, long-wheelbase specials.
The question of future Volvo styling is up for debate as well. According to Reuters, "Insiders say Li is a big fan of the new styling that design chief Thomas Ingenlath has brought to Volvo" (The latest example, the Concept Coupe from this week's Frankfurt Motor Show, is shown above.) Yet there are those who worry whether the company's new styling strategy is showy enough to appeal to China's wealthy. Chairman Li would still like to see a range-topping sedan for "show-off people," but Volvo's management doesn't want to go down that road. Clearly, this won't be the last we hear about the company's existential boardroom battles.

A car writer's year in new vehicles [w/video]

Christmas is only a week away. The New Year is just around the corner. As 2014 draws to a close, I'm not the only one taking stock of the year that's we're almost shut of. Depending on who you are or what you do, the end of the year can bring to mind tax bills, school semesters or scheduling dental appointments. For me, for the last eight or nine years, at least a small part of this transitory time is occupied with recalling the cars I've driven over the preceding 12 months. Since I started writing about and reviewing cars in 2006, I've done an uneven job of tracking every vehicle I've been in, each year. Last year I made a resolution to be better about it, and the result is a spreadsheet with model names, dates, notes and some basic facts and figures. Armed with this basic data and a yen for year-end stories, I figured it would be interesting to parse the figures and quantify my year in cars in a way I'd never done before. The results are, well, they're a little bizarre, honestly. And I think they'll affect how I approach this gig in 2015. {C} My tally for the year is 68 cars, as of this writing. Before the calendar flips to 2015 it'll be as high as 73. Let me give you a tiny bit of background about how automotive journalists typically get cars to test. There are basically two pools of vehicles I drive on a regular basis: media fleet vehicles and those available on "first drive" programs. The latter group is pretty self-explanatory. Journalists are gathered in one location (sometimes local, sometimes far-flung) with a new model(s), there's usually a day of driving, then we report back to you with our impressions. Media fleet vehicles are different. These are distributed to publications and individual journalists far and wide, and the test period goes from a few days to a week or more. Whereas first drives almost always result in a piece of review content, fleet loans only sometimes do. Other times they serve to give context about brands, segments, technology and the like, to editors and writers. So, adding up the loans I've had out of the press fleet and things I've driven at events, my tally for the year is 68 cars, as of this writing. Before the calendar flips to 2015, it'll be as high as 73. At one of the buff books like Car and Driver or Motor Trend, reviewers might rotate through five cars a week, or more. I know that number sounds high, but as best I can tell, it's pretty average for the full-time professionals in this business.