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VIDEO: Saturn's demise? We blame Jim Gaffigan*

Click above to view the video after the jump
When the deal to sell Saturn to Penske Automotive fell through, there were likely a lot of surprised people at General Motors' Detroit, MI headquarters. Penske released a statement saying that the reason the deal fell through after months of good faith negotiations was that a suitable post-GM supply of vehicles could not be found. However, after reacquainting ourselves with over eight minutes of outtakes from Jim Gaffigan's old Saturn commercial, we're thinking the comedic pitchman is to blame.

First GM ignition switch trial dismissed

Robert Scheuer has agreed to dismiss his ignition switch claims against General Motors to bring a sudden stop to the first federal trial over the automaker's faulty parts. The lawsuit was the first of six cases that were a bellwether to set a precedent in the complaints. Scheuer didn't receive any financial settlement from GM, according to Reuters. Scheuer alleged that he was injured when his 2003 Saturn Ion went off the road and hit the tree. The airbag didn't deploy, which Scheuer claimed was the result of the faulty ignition switch. GM originally attempted to dismiss the trial over a lack of evidence, but US District Judge Jesse Furman set a January 11 start date for the case. During the trial, GM's attorneys accused Scheuer and his wife of lying and presented evidence of an allegedly altered check stub that they used to purchase a house. Scheuer's defense had claimed that the family was evicted from the home after memory loss from the accident caused Robert to lose the down payment check. After the allegations, Furman pushed for a settlement. He called the trial an "outlier" and "almost worthless as a bellwether case," according to Bloomberg. The next of the six trials begins in March, Reuters reports. Related Video:

Guess when this car will plunge through the ice, win $1,500

In Michigan's Upper Peninsula, a sad-sack Saturn raises money for charity while awaiting an icy fate. The 1998 Saturn is a bright orange beacon inviting folks to make a bet on the coming of spring. When the weather warms up enough and this Saturn sinks, someone is going to take home $1,500. It's the Iron Mountain–Kingsford Rotary Club's annual car-plunge contest, a fundraiser that takes bets on when this car will fall through the ice. The contest had been run in years past and was resurrected in 2015. In the old days, the hapless cars sank to the bottom of the lake, which is actually a flooded old iron mine. In today's more enlightened environmental era, this Saturn is attached to a cable affixed to an anchor on shore, allowing it to be yanked out of the water. It also has been drained of all fluids, degreased, and had its powertrain, battery, and radiator removed (which means it weighs about 1,800 pounds). The lake sits alongside a main highway, assuring maximum visibility for the car and the contest. But it's not only locals who are invited to take a chance; anyone 18 and over can bet via this online link. Ten dollars buys three chances. Whoever most closely guesses the date and time that the Saturn slips under the waves takes home $1,500. Betting closes March 15. The past four years have seen the car fall through on March 17, April 2, April 4, and April 26 — although, as they say, past performance is no guarantee of future returns. And remember: Bet with your head, not over it. Here's video of last year's fateful moment ...