2000 Saturn Sw2 Base Wagon 4-door 1.9l on 2040-cars

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Clever video selling Saturn Ion "sex machine" will catch your eye

"When I think of the most impressive, industry changing, earth shattering vehicles of recent history, the first car that comes to my mind is the 2004 Saturn Ion Coupe." So says Brad Holt of Dallas, Texas. And he's right, clearly. One look at the specific specimen Holt is selling will be enough to convince you that the car "will absolutely tickle every one of your fancies," as claimed by the seller himself.
We suggest you watch the video below to see just how perfectly Holt's sex machine will fit into your life. The end result will no doubt be exactly as Holt ends his video: "You need it. Like a lot." You can also read more info from Brad in an interview here. If only our offices were a little closer to Dallas...

VIDEO: Saturn's demise? We blame Jim Gaffigan*

Click above to view the video after the jump
When the deal to sell Saturn to Penske Automotive fell through, there were likely a lot of surprised people at General Motors' Detroit, MI headquarters. Penske released a statement saying that the reason the deal fell through after months of good faith negotiations was that a suitable post-GM supply of vehicles could not be found. However, after reacquainting ourselves with over eight minutes of outtakes from Jim Gaffigan's old Saturn commercial, we're thinking the comedic pitchman is to blame.

Before Chevrolet's Redline, there was the Saturn Red Line

While Chevy rolls out Redline special editions across more of the lineup at this year's Chicago Auto Show, we've been eating some 'member berries and started thinking about the last time GM used the term. Back in 2004, Saturn rolled out Red Line (two words) editions of the Ion and Vue. The lineup was joined by the Sky Red Line in 2007, and the second-generation Vue kept the tradition going in 2008. This was in the heady days of the mid-2000s, before the financial crisis and GM's bankruptcy reorganization that saw the end of Saturn. The press release headline for the 2008 Sky is now cringe-worthy: "Hot-selling Sky helps drive Saturn product renaissance." Performance lineups were the hot new thing, as automakers attempted to cash in on the tuner trend popularized by The Fast and the Furious. Chevy had SS models, Pontiac had GXP, and Saturn had Red Line. Across the Detroit Metro area, Dodge had a slew of SRT models, and Ford's Special Vehicle Team brought us the SVT Lightning pickup, the SVT Focus, and a smattering of hopped-up Mustangs. The performance cred of Red Line models varied from car to car. The Ion Red Line shared the same engine as the original Chevy Cobalt SS, a 205-horsepower supercharged 2.0-liter four-cylinder, 65 hp more than stock. Car and Driver tested one with a 0-to-60-mph time of 6.1 seconds and said the Ion "tears down the wall that has separated enthusiasts from the Saturn brand for so long." The Vue Red Line, meanwhile, came with the same optional Honda-sourced 3.5-liter V6 you could get in the regular Vue, and added a stiffer, lower suspension, bigger wheels with more aggressive rubber, and recalibrated steering assist. When the Vue was redesigned for the 2008 model year, the Vue Red Line was a similar proposition. The engine was now from GM, and up 7 horsepower to 257, but you could get it in both Red Line and XE trim. Aside from the tire and suspension upgrades, Red Line models now came with a unique front fascia and rear exhaust cutouts. The most exciting Red Line, of course, was the high-performance version of the Sky roadster, which shared underpinnings with its Pontiac Solstice twin. This model came with GM's hot 2.0-liter Ecotec Turbo, good for 260 horsepower. The extra power was crucial in covering up the Sky's unfortunate manual gearbox ratios, which left the non-turbo model aching for torque in lower gears. As we all know, Saturn was taken by the grim reaper in 2009 after an attempt to sell the brand to the Penske Group.