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Mark Webber treats Maria Sharapova to a Porsche 918 Spyder joyride

We don't much like Mark Webber right now. Part of being a racing driver is dealing with promotional stuff. It's not hard to find a driver that can't stand all this nonsense, whether it be promoting a product, meeting investors or attending some obscure event. Even a driver of Webber's caliber - a former Formula One driver for Red Bull Racing and a member of Porsche's factory Le Mans team - has to serve his time at the promo events.
Somehow, though, we don't think the Aussie driver minds this particular promo detail. In the video below, Webber attends the Porsche Tennis Grand Prix in Stuttgart. He then takes tennis superstar Maria Sharapova out for a spin behind the wheel of the Porsche 918 Spyder. The level of jealousy at the Autoblog office is palpable.
Take a look below for the video. And as we're super jealous of Mr. Webber, hop into Comments and caption the above photo based on what you think he's saying to Maria. Bonus points if you can work "vegemite" into the caption.

'Faster. Farther.' dives into the history of Porsche racing tech

No doubt, Porsche has produced some of the best endurance racecars around, such as the turbocharged, slant-nose 935 of the 1970s and the ground-effects-enhanced 956 and 962 of the 1980s. But the company's most famous racecar, its first overall winner at the 24 Hours of Le Mans, was the 917.
The 917 embodied many of Porsche's technological achievements up to that point, such as the company's first 12- and 16-cylinder engines (the flat-16 was never used in competition), fiberglass bodies that implemented early aerodynamic practices and the use of new, exotic materials, such as magnesium and titanium.
The racecar was commissioned by the head of Porsche Motorsports, Ferdinand Piëch, to win overall at the 24 Hours of Le Mans in 1970, after he realized a loophole in the rules that allowed cars to compete with engines up to five liters in the Sport category if they were also production models. Piëch saw opportunity: the top prototype class was restricted to three liters; the production minimum to compete in Sport was 25 cars. And so, with much effort, Porsche assembled 25 "production" 4.5-liter 917s and had them parked in a neat line for the race inspectors to verify their legitimacy. It didn't take long before people realized the new Porsches were much faster than the prototype racers, with a top speed approaching 250 miles per hour.

McLaren P1 squares off against Porsche 918 in Evo track battle

Evo's side-by-side comparison of the McLaren P1 against the Porsche 918 Spyder isn't the first time we've seen England and Germany's ultimate automotive weapons sized up together; last month, Autocar tested them over the standing mile, with a Ducati 1199 Superleggera playing the joker. Evo throws a few curves at its test, though, taking the supercars to Anglesey Circuit in Wales to see which will lay down the fastest lap time with scribe Jethro Bovington at the wheel. In case the numbers haven't yet been seared into your memory, while both are assisted by electric motors, the 3,069-pound, rear-wheel drive P1 gets on with 903 horsepower and 664 pound-feet from a 3.8-liter, twin-turbocharged V8. The 3,750-pound, all-wheel-drive 918 Spyder does its job with 795 hp and 575 lb-ft surging out of a naturally aspirated, 4.6-liter V8. We're not told know which circuit layout he uses for the test, but both cars comfortably eclipse the mark set by the fastest coupe Evo's driven around it so far, the Ferrari 458 Speciale. Then, in an epilogue occasioned by a tire change, one of the supercars comfortably eclipses its own time again, before Bovington declares one the master of the track and the other the ruler of the street. Enjoy finding out which is which in the video above.