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Porsche planning jacked-up 911 Safari? [w/poll]

The Porsche 911 may, for some, be the quintessential sportscar. And that typically means keeping it on paved roads and racing circuits. But there's a proud history to taking the Elfen off-road that traces back to specially-prepared 911s (like the one pictured above) which Porsche fielded in rallies in the late '70s and early '80s. And now Porsche is reportedly preparing to tap back into that history with a new off-road 911 model, according to the Auto Bild Motor Revue.
Tipped to be called the 911 Safari, the special variant would be based on the Carrera 4 but upgrade with bigger tires fitted to a beefed-up suspension with higher ground clearance and underbody skid plates. The model is expected to be presented initially as a concept at the Beijing Motor Show next April. But if enough interest is expressed - particularly from buyers in developing markets where the roads might not be as smooth as those to which North American and European drivers have become accustomed - Stuttgart could put it into production in 2016, when the current 991 is expected to get a mid-cycle refresh.
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Watch the incredibly complicated operation of Porsche's new targa roof

Despite Porsche having claimed the name, targa tops are nothing new. In addition to the semi-roofless version of the 911, plenty of cars in the past have used removable roof panels - the new Corvette Stingray has one (as have prior generations), and this type of open-air experience has been available on past vehicles like the Pontiac Solstice Coupe and Honda Civic del Sol.
But when Porsche took the top off its brand new 911 Targa here at the Detroit Auto Show, it was indeed cause for pause. Simply put, this is one of the most complicated and intricate electronic roof panel removal techniques we've ever seen, save perhaps, for the setup found on the Japanese-market Civic del Sol from the 1990s.
We won't spoil the video for you, but basically, rather than just the roof panel coming off, the entire rear glass area lifts away the body in order for the small section over the passenger compartment to slide back. This has to be incredibly expensive to repair once it inevitably breaks. And we highly doubt you'll be able to operate this mechanism at any speed.

Mark Webber treats Maria Sharapova to a Porsche 918 Spyder joyride

We don't much like Mark Webber right now. Part of being a racing driver is dealing with promotional stuff. It's not hard to find a driver that can't stand all this nonsense, whether it be promoting a product, meeting investors or attending some obscure event. Even a driver of Webber's caliber - a former Formula One driver for Red Bull Racing and a member of Porsche's factory Le Mans team - has to serve his time at the promo events.
Somehow, though, we don't think the Aussie driver minds this particular promo detail. In the video below, Webber attends the Porsche Tennis Grand Prix in Stuttgart. He then takes tennis superstar Maria Sharapova out for a spin behind the wheel of the Porsche 918 Spyder. The level of jealousy at the Autoblog office is palpable.
Take a look below for the video. And as we're super jealous of Mr. Webber, hop into Comments and caption the above photo based on what you think he's saying to Maria. Bonus points if you can work "vegemite" into the caption.