1997 Mitsubishi Mirage Ls Sedan 4-door 1.8l on 2040-cars

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This Mitsubishi dealer's rap ad is so bad it's awesome

Sometimes you stumble upon something online that is so incredibly, bad that there is actually something great about. With that in mind, Southside Mitsubishi in Edmonton, Alberta, Canada, might have created one of the worst/best automotive raps we've ever seen.
While there is no way the dealership went into this video thinking it would actually be good, it's hard to imagine it could have ended up so incredibly cheesy. Whether it's the frontman who looks like Vladimir Putin on his worst day ever, the extras who clearly don't want to be there or the inexplicable reference to that Baha Men classic, "Who Let The Dogs Out?" this video is a black hole of suffering - there is no escape. We knew things were bad at Mitsubishi, and man, this isn't helping.
Scroll down to inflict this awful awesomeness on yourself, and remind yourself of the infamous Swagger Wagon from Toyota to see that not all ironic automotive rapping has to be painful.

Mitsubishi turning Montero into crossover, Outlander Sport may get PHEV variant

Mitsubishi is getting more and more forthcoming about its plans for the US market. Among the tidbits revealed during a chat with Edmunds at the 2014 Chicago Auto Show, MMNA Executive Vice President Don Swearingen said that "We are committed to huge investments in capital as well as huge investments in R&D." The marquee product of that investment could be a new Montero for the 2017 or 2018 model year, suggestions of which were raised with the Concept GC-PHEV at the 2013 Tokyo Motor Show and again at the end of last year. Swearingen said the proposed SUV is a little smaller than a Ford Explorer and that dealers have seen a picture of it. A decision on whether to bring it to the US will be made later this year.
Below that, incremental improvements will come to every model over the next couple of years. The Outlander will get a facelift next year before a major restyle in 2016, when the Outlander PHEV is also expected to finally make it here. In 2015 the Outlander Sport will be fitted with larger engine and a new, quieter CVT returning better acceleration and fuel economy. In 2016 it will also be redesigned, and it will be equipped with the company's new telematics system that goes into the Outlander the following year.
At the other end of the line-up, the Mirage will get a big dose of love in two years. Detail changes like better fabric inside and outside-mirror indicators are slated for 2015, and in 2016 the bargain hatchback gets "a sleek, aerodynamic" reskin. The Mirage G4 sedan could join the US range if the Canadians turn out to be fans of it. The Lancer gets only meager attentions, while the i-MiEV gets the cold shoulder and won't change at all. We get the cold shoulder as far as a next-generation Evo - Swearingen didn't say a word about that, apparently.

Mitsubishi pondering $2B share sale?

Mitsubishi makes the brilliantly fast, wonderfully fun Lancer Evolution. Outside of that road-going rally car, the rest of the range is pretty poor - the new Outlander isn't bad, but the subcompact Mirage looks like might've been competitive five years ago, while the Galant and Lancer have suffered from serial neglect.
This hasn't just lead to rumors of Mitsu's death in America; the subsidiary of the massive Mitsubishi Group has been in trouble at home, too. It was bailed out by three other Mitsubishi Group companies - Mitsubishi UFJ Financial, Mitsubishi Heavy Industries and Mitsubishi Corporation - between 2004 and 2005, according to Bloomberg. Now, it's attempting to extricate itself from "emergency mode," as analyst Koichi Sugimoto told the financial site, adding that "they're still in the very early stages of recovery."
As part of the bailout, Mitsubishi issued its three saviors billions of dollars of preferred shares, which don't have voting rights. The problem is, Mitsubishi hasn't issued dividend payments since 1998, and these stocks aren't exactly competing with Apple or Google, in terms of value. In other words, they're mostly worthless. With a public offering, Mitsubishi is expecting to raise 200 billion yen, or about $2 billion, in order to reduce the number of preferred shares. If all goes according to plan, it will wipe out preferred shares by March of 2014, or the end of fiscal year 2013.