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Conan O'Brien takes McConaughey's Lincoln ad to its logical conclusion

We all had to see this coming. Conan O'Brien has released a parody of Matthew McConaughey's new ads for the 2015 Lincoln MKC and remixed them with lines from one of his most critically acclaimed recent roles.
The now much darker commercial probably isn't how Lincoln would prefer the MKC to be marketed, but really in a few of the actual ads, McConaughey already seems moments away from breaking into a full Rustin Cohle from True Detective impression. The cadence and tone of his voice are just so close to that character, especially in the one where he's talking to the bull standing in the middle of the road. It very nearly verges on parody anyway; Conan is just turning all of this up to 11.
It's a little surprising that the writers didn't dig a little deeper into the McConaughey oeuvre for the parody. Maybe McConaughey could have taken the MKC for a party at the Moon Tower from Dazed and Confused. In any case, it's worth a quick watch, so check it out.

BMW tops Consumer Reports 2023 Brand Report Card

Feels like we wrote about Consumer Reports' 2022 Brand Report Car and 10 Top Picks a few weeks ago, but it was last April. So the mag is back with a ranked roster of 32 brands and 10 vehicles in four categories for your debating pleasure. Starting with the brands, last year's top three were Subaru, Mazda and BMW. This year, the Munich crew climbed two spots to win the prize thanks to "Superb road test scores and solid results in CR’s reliability and owner satisfaction surveys." Subaru narrowly fell to second, maintaining its four-year run in the top three. Mini, eighth last year, jumped five spots to get the last step on the podium. The rest of the top 10 were Lexus (up one spot from last year), Honda (down one spot from last year), Toyota (up three), Genesis (up 12), Mazda (down six), Audi (down three) and Kia (up eight). The magazine and testing outfit says its Brand Report Card "[reveals] which automakers are producing the most well-performing, safe, and reliable vehicles based on CRÂ’s independent testing and member surveys," and that "Brands that rise to the top tend to have the most consistent performance across their model lineups." Last year's top 10 had six automakers from Japan, three from Germany (giving Mini credit for England), none from the U.S. or South Korea, and five luxury brands. This year's list counts five makes from Japan, two from Germany because Porsche fell out of the top ten, two from South Korea, still none from the U.S., and four luxury brands. Buick again ranked as the best domestic, dropping to 12th after being 11th last year. The big mover was Lincoln, its 10-place jump up to 16th attributed to better reliability from the Corsair and Nautilus. Tesla's improved overall reliability saw it climb six spots to 17th. Dodge climbed one spot to 15th. Jeep got out of the penalty box in last to come second-to-last. Land Rover fell three places into the penalty spot.  CR's top 10 vehicle models The 10 Top Picks list is practically a new list. Only two holdovers made it to 2023, those being the Subaru Forester and Kia Telluride.

Lincoln Continental to end after one-and-done generation?

After only 18 months on sale, the vultures of rumor have begun circling above the Lincoln Continental. Ford Authority says "sources intricately familiar with Ford Motor Company's future product plans" for the domestic luxury brand say the Continental won't get another chance at life after this generation. Those sources didn't detail Ford's reasons for dispatching the executioner on another sad task, but if this is true, even the reasons we can only guess make enough sense to justify the move. The Continental launched into a crossover mania still mushrooming in strength like some Marvel villain, the equivalent of a new dinosaur hatching a few months before the Chicxulub Impact Event. In 18 months, the Continental sold 18,846 units, 12,012 of those sales happening in 2017. In the U.S. this year, sales amounted to 1,573 units through February, about 25 percent down on the annualized monthly rate. It could be worse: The Lexus GS has found 1,009 U.S. buyers so far this year, the Acura RLX, 285. Conversely, the Cadillac XTS — yes, a fleet darling — secured 3,163 sales in the same period. And the German kingpins live in another dimension, with BMW scooting 5,641 5 Series models off dealer lots, and the Mercedes E-Class boasting 8,411 sales of all three variants. Even the much more expensive and much more profitable Lincoln Navigator rang up 2,351 sales in the first 60 days of 2018. That's disheartening reading, especially after Ford reportedly spent more than $1 billion to bring the Continental to market. Sedan segment woes look to have killed the Continental's platform siblings, too, making the Lincoln's demise simply part of the cull. The CD4 architecture also underpins the Ford Fusion and Lincoln MKZ. Ford canceled the Fusion redesign and won't commit to making either vehicle after 2020. Lincoln's passenger car sales declined more than 30 percent last month; meanwhile, Lincoln needs to spend its money on the crossovers that are selling, and investment in the coming three-row Aviator that will replace the MKT. Ford has a CD6 platform in development that suits front-, rear-, and all-wheel-drive vehicles. Under previous CEO Mark Fields, a new Fusion, Mustang, and MKZ would ride on the CD6, as well as the new Explorer and a Lincoln brother. Those plans left with the previous administration, and company sources told both Ford Authority and The Truth About Cars not to expect a Continental revival on that architecture. Related Video: