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Kia Soul EV ad campaign charges up with sexified hamsters

It's official: Kia's adorable Soul-hawking Hamsters have crossed that line. It was one thing when they first hit the scene, and we got a small chuckle out of their trimmer looks for the refreshed, 2014 Soul. This, though, is too much.
This is Kia's latest commercial for the 2015 Soul EV, and it starts off typically enough. The hamsters seem to be tinkering in a laboratory attempting to modify a standard, gas-powered Kia. But then, some Weird Science-like trickery occurs and, well, the results are rather disturbing.
You'll need to watch yourself if you want to experience the horror. Take a look, and then head into Comments and let us know what you think.

2015 Kia K900

Let's be honest, Rich America. When you drive your fullsize luxury sedans, you don't clock any laps of the Nürburgring. You don't view your car as an alternative to air travel, ready to wheel between countries at triple-digit Autobahn speeds. Heck, you don't even take the long way home. Instead, you commute in fender-to-fender gridlock looking to be assuaged by sybaritic luxuries, your ride serving as a four-wheeled extension of your living room. Yet when it comes time to vote with your pocketbooks, you overwhelmingly skew toward European driving values - German ones, more specifically. You favor the firm rides, firmer seats and quick steering of cars like the BMW 7 Series and Audi A8. What gives? That's what Kia is clandestinely asking with its new 2015 K900.
According to Kia PR director Scott McKee, this 200.6-inch bruiser of a sedan is all about "at-ease luxury." That's a notion that was once very much synonymous with American automakers' approach to big high-end sedans - effortless comfort above all other considerations. Sprawling room in every direction. Fine materials no matter where the hand falls. The automobile as an isolative cocoon. Once upon a time, Cadillac and Lincoln owned the Comfort First game, but these days, there's almost nobody playing - the Lexus LS and Hyundai Equus are the only cars in this end of the market, everyone else is busy aping German values.
Kia planners could claim that the K900 has been intentionally targeted at a different sort of customer - and indeed, during the press conference ahead of our first drive in Santa Barbara, there was some discussion of "a different kind of luxury" and seeking "confident individualist" buyers. But the truth is, the Korean premium car shoppers that this car was primarily designed for crave exactly the sort of plush luxury experience the K900 dispenses. In other words, Kia is hoping that there are a few thousand like-minded Americans willing to overlook the badge on its nose and give this car a chance.

Kia dealers report K900 flagship RWD sedan is coming to US

Kia has told dealers that it will bring a $50,000 to $70,000, rear-drive flagship sedan to the United States early in 2014, although it won't be called what you think. Instead of the unloved Quoris name, the full-size sedan will be called the K900.
That name change is a welcomed one, judging by our initial reactions to Quoris. Names aside, though, the K900 sounds like an interesting piece of kit. It'll be riding on the same platform as the Hyundai Equus, although we suspect Kia's car will be quite a different beast than it's corporate cousin. Automotive News is reporting that the K900 should have a pair of engines when it arrives in the US - a 3.8-liter V6 and a 5.0-liter V8. The former puts out 290 horsepower, while the V8, which is likely the same Tau engine found in the Equus, should have around 420 hp. LED headlights, adaptive cruise control and all the other trimmings expected at this price point will also make appearances on the K900.
Kia's national dealer council, Don Hobden, told Automotive News the K900 should represent "7-Series value for a 5-Series price." While Kia wouldn't comment on the new model, AN reports that it's targeting 5,000 units next year, with a limited rollout at select dealerships.