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Watch this bad parker get what's coming to him

If you're lucky enough to have a nice vehicle, do your fellow gearheads a favor and don't park like a clown. Seriously. Not only will you anger everyone who is trying to find a place to park, but your nice car is a billboard reinforcing the stereotype that car people are self-important and inconsiderate.
Take this gentleman for example. He has a Jaguar XK, and understandably wants to take care of it. Rather than parking it far, far away from any other cars and getting a bit of exercise by walking to his building, he takes up two spots (albeit barely) close to the structure. From the cameraman's narration, we can tell his coworkers are less than thrilled about his inability to stay between the lines.
Naturally, they wanted to teach him a lesson, so they parked a bigger vehicle as close to his driver's door as possible. Mr. XK's attempts to enter his vehicle are rather amusing, culminating in his climbing through the passenger side and scooching over to the driver's seat. While we can debate this sort of treatment all day long, it was effective. The video includes a follow up at the end showing where the XK driver parked the next day, and as you might guess, it wasn't in the same spot.

US-spec 2017 Jaguar XE sport sedan revealed

The Jaguar XE touched down in certain international markets earlier this year, but now the US gets its first crack at the 2017 model, already updated after just a few months on sale. Our various drives of the entry-level cat have made us purr, and the price/engine combos aren't bad either: $34,900 for the XE 25t and its 2.0-liter turbocharged four-cylinder gas engine with 240 horsepower and 251 pound-feet of torque, $36,400 for the XE 20d and its 2.0-liter diesel four-cylinder with 180 hp and 311 lb-ft, and $41,700 for the XE 35t and its 3.0-liter supercharged V6 with 340 hp and 332 lb-ft. All those prices are before the $995 destination charge. That Ingenium diesel will be the first oil-powered Jaguar on our shores, and will be one of the two models available with the company's torque-on-demand all-wheel drive, along with the 340-hp supercharged V6. Both AWD models are pure rear-wheel drive until power is required up front, at which time it can be shunted forward in 165 milliseconds. All trims get a ZF eight-speed automatic, but the supercharged 35t gets the sturdier 8HP70 transmission, while the rest get the more compact 8HP45 transmission. Cabin options will include an InControl Touch infotainment system with an eight-inch screen or an InControl Touch Pro system with a 10.2-inch screen and Apple Watch connectivity. Standard audio comes from a 380-watt system with 11 speakers, the upgrade runs to 825 watts and adds six more speakers. The sheet of standard and optional driver aids lists All-Surface Progress Control, a low-speed cruise control on top of adaptive cruise control, a laser heads-up display, Traffic Sign Recognition and an adaptive speed limiter that uses traffic sign information. The even newer XE gets here next spring, you can read more about it in the meantime in the press release below. 2017 JAGUAR XE DEBUTS IN LOS ANGELES WITH AWD AND APPLE WATCH CONNECTIVITY - Award-winning Jaguar XE sports sedan to arrive in U.S.

Jaguar F-Type US order guide loose online

An alleged US order guide for the 2014 Jaguar F-Type has made its way online courtesy of the good people at F-TypeClub.com, documenting everything from wheel color options to special equipment packages. From the looks of things, buyers will be able to choose from a total of eight wheel designs in sizes ranging from 18 inches on the base model all the way up to 20 inches. While most of those rollers are available in either silver or black finishes, the 20-inch blade-style wheels are not only forged, but come with carbon-fiber trim. Fancy.
Depending on trim, F-Type buyers will get to choose between two types of seat, including a set of performance-style 14-way power adjustable thrones, complete with seat belts in black, red or tan. Other fun tricks include available power folding side view mirrors and a 770-watt, 14-speaker Meridian sound system.