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Automotive April Fools' joke roundup [w/videos]

Happy April, everyone. And we all know what this first day of the month means: April Fools' Day. Today is a national holiday for pranksters with the Internet acting as a serious enabler, and it's always fun to see what kind of vivid imaginations exist out there in the automotive world. The abundance of fake news gets a little old as the day rolls on, but we did manage to get in a few chuckles thanks to a handful of major automakers and automotive news outlets that got into the pranking spirit this year
Some of our favorites this year includes Subaru showing what happens when you combine a bunch of rumors, a Corvette some may have already thought was a joke or Honda providing some in-car innovation circa the late 1980s. Honestly, we're still waiting for official confirmation from Mitsubishi that the recently introduced 2014 Mirage is an elaborate April Fools' joke using a failed design intended for the 1995 Geo Metro. We dug up as much "official" OEM foolishness we could find, as well as some of our other favorites, and posted them all below.

Fernando Alonso expects to retire after McLaren-Honda

When Fernando Alonso was three years old, his father gave him a model of a McLaren-Honda grand prix car. That's where his path to Formula One started, and it's where he wants his career to end as well. Speaking with Autosport, the two-time world champion indicated that he intends to retire after he's done at McLaren, rather than switch to another team. Of course, he didn't indicate just when that would be, but as far as he's concerned, the road ends in Woking. The highly rated and immensely successful Spanish driver has been on the grid for fourteen years now. He started out with Minardi (precursor to Toro Rosso) in 2001, then spent four seasons with Renault, where he scored back-to-back world titles. He then switched to McLaren for one year, where he won four races, then back to Renault for another three where he and the team fell off their form. Fernando subsequently switched to Ferrari where he spent the last five seasons, thrice finishing second in the world championship but never quite managing to clinch an elusive third title. This year he's back at McLaren but has had a bumpy start. After crashing during a pre-season test session, he sat out the season opener, and failed to finish the second round in Malaysia. He's now in Shanghai preparing for this weekend's Chinese Grand Prix. Like this writer, he'll be turning 34 in July, making him the fourth oldest driver on the grid this year. So he's still got a good few years in him, and will likely want to see the troubled rekindling of the McLaren-Honda partnership through to winning form. But while nobody can tell what the future will bring, it looks like any other team that hopes to lure the champ away could end up disappointed.

2015 Honda Civic Type-R benchmarks the cream of the hot hatch crop

Honda has something wicked up its sleeve, based on the latest batch of spy photos we've received. This is purportedly the next Honda Civic Type-R, out testing in Germany and on the Nürburgring. The last generation of the Type-R went out of production in Europe in 2010, and while we admired it from afar, it's 2.0-liter, four-cylinder produced similar figures to the American-market Honda Civic Si.
From the looks of both it and the cars Honda engineers are benchmarking, the next Type-R will be much more powerful. In the spy photos, we can see four meaty exhaust pipes along with what is quite clearly an intercooler hiding behind the rear bumper. That's right, the next Type-R will be turbocharged. It'll need to be, though, if it's meant to tackle cars like the Opel Astra OPC, Ford Focus RS500 and Renault Megane RS Trophy (not pictured, but there according to our spies).
300 horsepower from a 2.0-liter engine should be on offer, and would match the competition quite well. Other obvious tweaks from the ho-hum five-door Civic are mainly aerodynamic. It sports an aggressive body kit with a meaty chin spoiler, rocker panels and a big rear wing. Red Brembo brake calipers can also be seen behind the sporty wheels and low-profile tires.