Find or Sell Used Cars, Trucks, and SUVs in USA

Gmc Envoy Slt 2003 Salvage Damaged Repairable Rebuildable Super-funky! on 2040-cars

Year:2003 Mileage:147500
Location:

Philadelphia, Pennsylvania, United States

Philadelphia, Pennsylvania, United States
Advertising:

Feast your eyes and senses on our broke-down 2003 GMC Envoy SLT. I’m going to be blunt about this so that there is no misunderstanding: this vehicle does not run currently. A coolant leak led to a head gasket failure and a dramatic engine stall at the bottom of a giant bridge, and that’s all she wrote.

Beyond the obvious of it not running, the vehicle is in pretty good shape. It has nice leather interiors with heated seat warmers that my wife loves so much that she almost forced me to shell out the cash to get the vehicle fixed. Thankfully, coolant heads prevailed (AUTO HUMOR). Other amenities include: 6-CD changer AM/FM Hi-Fi Stereo with futuristic steering wheel controls; Moon roof – vampire friendly; Third row seats for transporting people you don’t like very much; Cruise control – for cruising – like they did in the ‘50s; Automatic windows and locks – just like every other car manufactured after 1989; Tinted windows, so you can do things you don’t want other people to see you doing, you naughty thing; Recently changed oil; Full tank of gas (wish I’d have seen this coming before I filled it up); Zone specific AC/heating – it’s like a bubble of comfort. And so on and so forth.

So here we are – time to sell the vehicle we’ve come to affectionately refer to as the S.S. Slut.

Here are just a few things you could do with this vehicle, should you choose to buy it:

-Replace the engine and go on a cross-country tour to re-enact Jack Kerouac’s On the Road

-Make it a paper weight for very large reproductions of the U.S. Constitution

-Convince actors Craig Robinson and Rob Corddry to use it as a prop in Hot Tub Time Machine 3:
                 S.S. Slut

-Crush it into a giant cube and stack it in a pile of other giant car-cubes to build a 1/30 scale
                 model of the Empire State Building

-Strip it down for parts and light it on fire to ward off night-time attacks from the Zed Runners

-Fix it and let your teenager crash it into a pole one week after he gets his license

Whether or not any of these things are possible are totally up to your imagination and/or the laws of physics.

Here’s my deal: I don’t want any hassle selling this thing. I’ve been through enough. Negotiation is hassle and will not be engaged in. We set a modest reserve, but beyond that, the winning bidder gets the prize. Payment can be through cashier's check or straight cash, homey.  Regardless of the tone of this listing, joke bids will be dealt with by honey bee attack and/or negative feedback rating. CAN YOU NOT SEE I’M SERIOUS ABOUT SELLING THIS VEHICLE?! DON’T PLAY WITH MY EMOTIONS!

You will be responsible for moving this (again-NOT FUNCTIONING) vehicle from the streets of South Philly with the clear title in your hand.

Love,

The Captain of the S.S. Slut

Auto Services in Pennsylvania

Young`s Auto Body Inc ★★★★★

Auto Repair & Service, Automobile Body Repairing & Painting, Automobile Parts & Supplies
Address: 111 S Bolmar St, Thornton
Phone: (610) 431-2053

West Shore Auto Care ★★★★★

Auto Repair & Service, Auto Oil & Lube, Truck Service & Repair
Address: 736 State St, Carlisle-Barracks
Phone: (717) 730-7060

Village Auto ★★★★★

Used Car Dealers
Address: 52 Rocky Grove Ave, Oil-City
Phone: (814) 432-4509

Ulrich Sales & Svc ★★★★★

Auto Repair & Service, Used Car Dealers
Address: 4340 Morgantown Rd, Isabella
Phone: (610) 856-7050

Trust Auto Sales ★★★★★

New Car Dealers
Address: 1422 Trindle Rd Ste C, Plainfield
Phone: (717) 249-2667

Steve`s Auto Body & Repair ★★★★★

Automobile Body Repairing & Painting
Address: 115 Valley View Dr, Marwood
Phone: (724) 763-1333

Auto blog

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