2-1979 Ford Ranchero's on 2040-cars

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Who would win in a race if the Super Bowl teams were cars?

Until the last down is played this Sunday, we will have the annoyance pleasure of listening to analysts bicker between who will win the Super Bowl, not unlike automotive analysts who do the same thing with cars. If I had a dollar for every conversation about what car would win against another on a specific track, I wouldn't be buying the raw avocados this year for my guacamole. Instead I would be purchasing organic avocados and have the guacamole served in a Ferrari-themed bowl. Yes, those exist. Even so, we still watch year after year knowing full well that the pre-game analysis typically adds up to less than what is left over in the chip bowl after the last guest leaves. Let's take a different approach to analysis this year, let's compare these teams to their vehicle equivalent to decide who would win in a fair race. How do you determine a fair race? When I think of a fair race I think of the Nurburgring. A track that is 12.9 miles, has 1,000 feet of elevation change, and is famously nicknamed The Green Hell by famed driver Jackie Stewart. Although your Supra may beat The Flash himself in a straight line, chances are once you push it to the limits on a 12.9-mile track your brakes will smell like a bonfire and your suspension will have gone into cardiac arrest twice. So if we're racing The 'Ring, what are we driving? To best answer that question we must determine what characteristics define these teams. Not being someone who knows more about my fantasy league than my significant other, I can only go off what I have heard from "experts." The Panthers are honestly known for Cam Newton. Cam is a versatile, fast, brash, and fairly young quarterback. He apologizes for nothing and has Ali-like confidence that shows in his choice of Liberace-type attire. Although he looks to be the favorite, he hasn't yet won a Super Bowl and the team's second-half performances are less than climatic. In racing terms, he has won a lot but no one has seen him race in the dark at the 24 Hours of Le Mans. The Panthers have a ton of acceleration, a brand new chassis, and a driver who is hungry for that first big win. On the other side of the track are the Broncos. It seems as though the Broncos are known for two things, a nostalgic quarterback and a defense that could strike fear into a Honey Badger. If the Broncos were just one component of a vehicle they would be the brakes, and these brakes are outfitted for a locomotive.

Welcome Audi RS6 Avant, goodbye Lincoln Continental | Autoblog Podcast #592

In this week's Autoblog Podcast, Editor-in-Chief Greg Migliore is joined by Senior Editor, Green, John Beltz Snyder and Assistant Editor Zac Palmer. Our editors cover a lot this week, starting with the news. They geek out over the Audi RS6 Avant coming to America, and mourn the loss of the Lincoln Continental. They address rumors of the Toyota Land Cruiser's demise, and analyze spy photos of the Ford Mach E electric crossover. They also honor the memory of the godfather of spy photography, Jim Dunne. Finally, they talk about driving the BMW Z4, Ram 1500 EcoDiesel, and another diesel, the diesel-powered Mazda CX-5 Skyactiv-D. Autoblog Podcast #592 Get The Podcast iTunes – Subscribe to the Autoblog Podcast in iTunes RSS – Add the Autoblog Podcast feed to your RSS aggregator MP3 – Download the MP3 directly Rundown Audi RS6 Avant headed to U.S. Lincoln Continental discontinued Rumor: Toyota Land Cruiser to be canceled Ford Mach E spied RIP spy photographer Jim Dunne Cars we're driving: 2019 BMW Z4 sDrive30i 2020 Ram 1500 EcoDiesel 2019 Mazda CX-5 Diesel Feedback Email – Podcast@Autoblog.com Review the show on iTunes Related Video:      

Ford Explorer Jackson Pollock Edition results in trip to hospital

Among the many useful pieces of driving advice we've taken to heart over the years, "Safely secure all cargo" is etched pretty high on our personal stone tablets. We've had a couple of frustrating moments over the years (numerous wonky cupholders and too-tall lidded cups; a radar detector that released its suction cups and dashed itself below the dashboard, etc.), but never anything like the scene above.
These photos above come courtesy of the Washington State Patrol, and they show the unfortunate aftermath of a driver, his dog, and his Ford Explorer after it crashed near the town of Belfair last week. According to reports, the man was schlepping five-gallon containers of paint inside his vehicle when he was involved in an unexplained accident. It's not clear what triggered the crash, but the impromptu abstract painting covered the whole of the interior, including the driver and his faithful companion.
The man was transported to a local hospital for minor injuries, and his dog was cleaned and later taken to a humane society.