1964 Ford F-100 on 2040-cars

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Who would win in a race if the Super Bowl teams were cars?

Until the last down is played this Sunday, we will have the annoyance pleasure of listening to analysts bicker between who will win the Super Bowl, not unlike automotive analysts who do the same thing with cars. If I had a dollar for every conversation about what car would win against another on a specific track, I wouldn't be buying the raw avocados this year for my guacamole. Instead I would be purchasing organic avocados and have the guacamole served in a Ferrari-themed bowl. Yes, those exist. Even so, we still watch year after year knowing full well that the pre-game analysis typically adds up to less than what is left over in the chip bowl after the last guest leaves. Let's take a different approach to analysis this year, let's compare these teams to their vehicle equivalent to decide who would win in a fair race. How do you determine a fair race? When I think of a fair race I think of the Nurburgring. A track that is 12.9 miles, has 1,000 feet of elevation change, and is famously nicknamed The Green Hell by famed driver Jackie Stewart. Although your Supra may beat The Flash himself in a straight line, chances are once you push it to the limits on a 12.9-mile track your brakes will smell like a bonfire and your suspension will have gone into cardiac arrest twice. So if we're racing The 'Ring, what are we driving? To best answer that question we must determine what characteristics define these teams. Not being someone who knows more about my fantasy league than my significant other, I can only go off what I have heard from "experts." The Panthers are honestly known for Cam Newton. Cam is a versatile, fast, brash, and fairly young quarterback. He apologizes for nothing and has Ali-like confidence that shows in his choice of Liberace-type attire. Although he looks to be the favorite, he hasn't yet won a Super Bowl and the team's second-half performances are less than climatic. In racing terms, he has won a lot but no one has seen him race in the dark at the 24 Hours of Le Mans. The Panthers have a ton of acceleration, a brand new chassis, and a driver who is hungry for that first big win. On the other side of the track are the Broncos. It seems as though the Broncos are known for two things, a nostalgic quarterback and a defense that could strike fear into a Honey Badger. If the Broncos were just one component of a vehicle they would be the brakes, and these brakes are outfitted for a locomotive.

Detroit Three autoworkers could get huge bonuses

For a long time, being a line worker for one of the Detroit Three has meant living with an uncertain future. With the health of American automakers on the rise, though, things are also starting to look up for the men and women building the cars. The latest sign that things aren't bad? Big profit-sharing checks.
According to The Detroit News, Ford, General Motors and Chrysler could end up paying over $800 million to 130,000 workers as part of a profit-sharing plan. According to The News, the economic impact of these profits in Michigan alone could exceed $400 million, besting the NFL's Super Bowl, MLB's All-Star Game and the NHL's Winter Classic for their economic impact.
This is the third straight year the Detroit Three have issued profit-sharing checks to UAW employees, and for many workers, the checks are as close as they'll get to a raise, due to the most recent contract between the union and the manufacturers. On average, employees at GM and Ford receive $1 for every $1 million in North American (not just the US) pre-tax profits. Chrysler, meanwhile, gets a similar deal, although the Auburn Hills-based company calculates profit sharing using 85 percent of the brand's global profits.

Ken Block and friends race light in silly-beautiful Castrol commercial

How does one make fast, loud, drifting cars better? Well, you can add more fast, loud, drifting cars or you can add lasers. Either or, really. In this case, Castrol did the right thing and added both, creating a highly stylized commercial for its Edge Titanium motor oil starring South African racer Adrian Zaugg, BMW factory driver Augusto Farfus, Audi DTM and Le Mans staple Mike Rockenfeller and some bloke named Ken Block.
Their cars? No surprise, but Block is in his Ford Fiesta GRC, while Zaugg samples a Lamborghini Aventador and Farfus and Rockenfeller drive along party lines, with a BMW M4 and an Audi R8, respectively. And those cars look good, too, thanks to the creative light and laser work on display.
Take a look below for the video from Castrol.