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BMW tops Consumer Reports 2023 Brand Report Card

Feels like we wrote about Consumer Reports' 2022 Brand Report Car and 10 Top Picks a few weeks ago, but it was last April. So the mag is back with a ranked roster of 32 brands and 10 vehicles in four categories for your debating pleasure. Starting with the brands, last year's top three were Subaru, Mazda and BMW. This year, the Munich crew climbed two spots to win the prize thanks to "Superb road test scores and solid results in CR’s reliability and owner satisfaction surveys." Subaru narrowly fell to second, maintaining its four-year run in the top three. Mini, eighth last year, jumped five spots to get the last step on the podium. The rest of the top 10 were Lexus (up one spot from last year), Honda (down one spot from last year), Toyota (up three), Genesis (up 12), Mazda (down six), Audi (down three) and Kia (up eight). The magazine and testing outfit says its Brand Report Card "[reveals] which automakers are producing the most well-performing, safe, and reliable vehicles based on CRÂ’s independent testing and member surveys," and that "Brands that rise to the top tend to have the most consistent performance across their model lineups." Last year's top 10 had six automakers from Japan, three from Germany (giving Mini credit for England), none from the U.S. or South Korea, and five luxury brands. This year's list counts five makes from Japan, two from Germany because Porsche fell out of the top ten, two from South Korea, still none from the U.S., and four luxury brands. Buick again ranked as the best domestic, dropping to 12th after being 11th last year. The big mover was Lincoln, its 10-place jump up to 16th attributed to better reliability from the Corsair and Nautilus. Tesla's improved overall reliability saw it climb six spots to 17th. Dodge climbed one spot to 15th. Jeep got out of the penalty box in last to come second-to-last. Land Rover fell three places into the penalty spot.  CR's top 10 vehicle models The 10 Top Picks list is practically a new list. Only two holdovers made it to 2023, those being the Subaru Forester and Kia Telluride.

BMW M3 and M4 CSL not in the cards

We aren't sure whether to file this one under "good news" or "bad news." BMW confirmed to Top Gear that there "are no plans" for lightweight versions of the new M3 and M4, in the same vein as the E46 M3 CSL (despite rumors to the contrary). The reason?
"There wasn't a CSL on the previous generation, and the way we look at it is like this: the CSL was great because it had this real focus on lightweight engineering. But we've already done that with these new cars. We've made them as light as possible - they come in under 1500 kilograms (3,306 pounds), which for a car like this is incredible," said Matt Collins, BMW's product manager for small to medium cars.
Now, as much as we love the idea of a hardcore version of any car, we appreciate BMW's point of view that the newest Ms are already as light and tough as they need to be. Collins elaborated, saying, "Rather than doing a halfway house to begin with and then rolling out a CSL, we thought we'd make the 'real' car as light as we possibly could. So we've no plans whatsoever to make a lighter, harder version just yet."

Automotive April Fools' joke roundup [w/videos]

Happy April, everyone. And we all know what this first day of the month means: April Fools' Day. Today is a national holiday for pranksters with the Internet acting as a serious enabler, and it's always fun to see what kind of vivid imaginations exist out there in the automotive world. The abundance of fake news gets a little old as the day rolls on, but we did manage to get in a few chuckles thanks to a handful of major automakers and automotive news outlets that got into the pranking spirit this year
Some of our favorites this year includes Subaru showing what happens when you combine a bunch of rumors, a Corvette some may have already thought was a joke or Honda providing some in-car innovation circa the late 1980s. Honestly, we're still waiting for official confirmation from Mitsubishi that the recently introduced 2014 Mirage is an elaborate April Fools' joke using a failed design intended for the 1995 Geo Metro. We dug up as much "official" OEM foolishness we could find, as well as some of our other favorites, and posted them all below.