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24 Hours of Le Mans live update part two

We tasked surfing journalist Rory Parker to watch this year's live stream of the 2016 24 Hours of Le Mans. What follows is an experiment to experience the world's greatest endurance race from the perspective of a motorsports novice. Parker lives in Hawaii and can hold his breath longer than he can go without swearing. For Part One, click here. Or you can skip ahead to Part Three here. I write about surfing for a living. If you can call it a living. Basically means I spend my days fucking around and my wife pays for everything. Because she's got a real job that pays well. Brings home the bacon. Very progressive arrangement. Super twenty first century. I run a surf website, beachgrit.com, with two other guys. It's a strange gig. More or less uncensored. Kind of popular. Very good at alienating advertisers. My behavior has cost us a few bucks. I'm terrible at self-censorship. Know there's a line out there, no idea where it lies. I still don't understand any of the technical side. Might as well be astrophysics or something. For contests I do long rambling write ups. They rarely make much sense. Mainly just talk about my life, whatever random thoughts pop into my head. "Can you do something similar for Le Mans?" "Sure, but I know absolutely fuck-all about racing." "That's okay. Just write what you want." "Will do. But you're gonna need to edit my stuff. Probably censor it heavily." So here I am. I spent the last week trying to learn all I can about the sport of endurance racing. But there's only so much you can jam in your head. And I still don't understand any of the technical side. Might as well be astrophysics or something. While I rambled things were happening. Tracy Krohn spun into the gravel on the Forza chicane. #89 is out of the race after an accident I missed. Pegasus racing hit the wall on the Porsche curves. Bashed up front end, in the garage getting fixed. Toyota and Porsche are swapping back and forth in the front three. Ford back in the lead in GTE Pro. #91 Porsche took a stone through the radiator, down two laps. Not good. The wife and I are one of those weird childless couples that spend way too much time caring for the needs of their pet. French bulldog, Mr Eugene Victor Debs. Great little guy. Spent the last four years training him to be obedient and friendly. Nice thing about dogs, when you're sick of dealing with them you can just lock 'em in another room for a few hours. You don't need to worry about paying for college.

Xcar flogs the 2016 Audi RS3

In its latest video, Xcar reckons that just as hypercars from brands like Pagani and Koenigsegg are taking supercars to a new level, the hyper hatch is now supplanting the hot hatch. Roughly defined as three- and five-door models making well in excess 300 horsepower, the reviewer holds up the new Audi RS3 as the poster child for this high-speed revolution that brings huge performance in a quite useful package. With 362 hp and 343 pound-feet of torque from its 2.5-liter turbocharged five-cylinder and a seven-speed dual-clutch gearbox, the RS3 certainly doesn't lack for performance. Audi claims that it can get to 62 miles per hour in 4.3 seconds and to a top speed of 174 miles per hour. Xcar portrays that power as quite livable, though. Apparently, this hyper hatch is made less for top performance at the track, than being sublime on the road. It seems that this hyper hatch isn't destined for these shores, though. Audi isn't bringing the five-door RS3 to the US, but a version in the body of the A3 sedan is highly rumored. If it's as wonderful as Xcar portrays the five-door, then this might be one to look forward to.

Audi overtakes BMW as adulterers' favorite car brand

As Audi hopes to surpass BMW as the top-selling luxury automaker, sometimes it has to look at the small victories, too. For instance, IllicitEncounters.com - a UK dating site for married folks (also known as adultery) - is reporting that a recent poll shows that more people willing to cheat on their spouses drive an Audi. Last year, this same poll showed that BMW was the car-of-choice for adulterers.
With Audi on top (pun intended) and BMW bumped to number two, Mercedes-Benz, Volvo and Volkswagen round out the top five car brands owned by unfaithful wives and husbands. Check out the poll over at IllicitEncounters.com, but be sure to clear your browser history afterward. You know, just to make sure your spouse doesn't get the wrong idea about the websites you visit.