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The Rolls-Royce of cocktails is a coddling ride for your tastebuds

In our last installment of the irregular and irreverent series on drinks loosely connected to – or named after – automobiles, we sipped a Speedway Cocktail, a drink that was as exciting (and dangerous) as the early Indy 500. This time, we're stirring a Rolls-Royce Cocktail with a silver spoon. And, as always, enjoy cocktails (and reading about them) while you're not behind the wheel. If the rumors we hear are correct, Rolls-Royce will be unveiling an all-new Phantom this summer. The arrival of a flagship Roller isn't quite as rare as the coronation of a new member of the British Royal Family, but is tres recherche nonetheless. Since the nameplate's founding nearly 100 years ago, this will be only the eighth generation of Phantom to be delivered into the greedy hands of the world's vilest oligarchs. If you're one of the .01 percent, this is cause for a drink, and what better cocktail to raise in toast than one named for the brand itself? (For us 99.99 percenters, the answer is easy: Molotov.) As you might expect, the Rolls-Royce cocktail is kind of a classied-up version of an upscale iteration of an already elegant drink, conjugated from the classic (gin) martini and it well-married brother, the Martinez. "It's basically a very wet martini," says Paul Hletko, founder of FEW Spirits, an Evanston, Illinois gin and whiskey distillery acronymically (and winkingly) named for local maven Frances Elizabeth Willard, who helped found the Women's Christian Temperance Union – one of the forces behind Prohibition. "Two-to-one is a fantastic ratio of gin to vermouth that really lets the vermouth shine, and then having that split between dry and sweet vermouths gives you fantastic and rich complexity, with that little bit of Benedictine being that really nice herbal add," Hletko told us. It all sounds intriguingly botanical, and the drink itself has a reputation as being a favorite among bartenders, a coupe brimming with insider insight. "In the history of drinking there are many cocktails made with vermouth and gin," says legendary mixologist Charles Schumann from Schumann's Gastronomie in Munich.

Rolls-Royce is officially in the SUV business

This might be the most brand-appropriate announcement ever for a previously unthinkinable vehicle, complete with a press release titled like a royal edict. After saying a month ago that it would decide on building an mixed-terrain hauler by the end of the year, Rolls-Royce issued a press release entitled, "An Open Letter from the Chairman and Chief Executive of Rolls-Royce Motor Cars on the Subject of a New Rolls-Royce." Let's hold on a second while the sound of trumpets dies down. Nowhere among its 453 words will you find the acronym "SUV," nor the words "sport" or "utility." You will find talk of "an all-new Rolls-Royce," "a high-bodied car, with an all-new aluminum architecture," "a vehicle that can cross any terrain," and references to Lawrence of Arabia traversing mountain ranges and "the vastness of unexplored deserts" and the founders' "rigorous overland adventures," complete with sepia photos. And then there's this: "History sets our precedent and our future calls us to action." Let's hold on a second while the applause dies down. We don't know when we'll see it - Rolls-Royce says it plans to take its time getting it right, to create a vehicle that is "Effortless ... Everywhere." We would believe any date we read about, though; not even two years ago we were told a Rolls-Royce SUV hadn't even been discussed since such a vehicle couldn't fit into the brand ethos, not even a year ago the company's head designer had narrowed it down to "a shooting brake, not a crossover with a sloping roof. A proper SUV," with the Ghost platform for support and a speculated release date of 2017. If they brought a near-production-ready sample to the Frankfurt Motor Show this year, we wouldn't be surprised. We sincerely hope that, like the image, it comes with a man to shovel any obstacles out of the way. Gather round the dais and enjoy the press release below. It's a whole new world. Related Video: AN OPEN LETTER FROM THE CHAIRMAN AND THE CHIEF EXECUTIVE OF ROLLS-ROYCE MOTOR CARS ON THE SUBJECT OF A NEW ROLLS-ROYCE 18.02.2015 -- The launch of Phantom in 2003 marked the beginning of the renaissance of Rolls-Royce Motor Cars. Since then, we have set a new benchmark for what a super-luxury car should be – unique, hand-crafted, beautiful and rare. Often imitated, Phantom has never been equalled and continues to be hailed as 'The Best Car in the World' by our customers and media alike.

Rolls-Royce Wraith convertible planned, SUV rumors kicked to the curb

Seeing as it adheres to the exotic car template we've known for years, it should surprise no one that the next model from Rolls-Royce will reportedly be a convertible version of the Wraith. When the coupe is on its way to dealers at the end of this year, company CEO Torsten Müller-Ötvös has told Autocar that the British luxury marque start applying itself to the convertible.
At no time will they apply themselves to an SUV, though. Still sticking to its brand-value guns, Müller-Ötvös says that an SUV wouldn't have that trademark Rolls-Royce feeling and that such a vehicle hasn't even been discussed. Having heard this before from other brands, we can't help but suspect that one day in the future we'll hear the phrase, "Oh, but this is the Rolls-Royce of SUVs."
The investment in an SUV would also mean a huge investment in the factory at Goodwood, however, since Wraith production is expected to need three shifts and raise levels to near capacity. And forget about building anything from The Spirit of Ecstasy somewhere else, Müller-Ötvös saying, "Rolls-Royces are built in Goodwood."