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Mark Webber treats Maria Sharapova to a Porsche 918 Spyder joyride

We don't much like Mark Webber right now. Part of being a racing driver is dealing with promotional stuff. It's not hard to find a driver that can't stand all this nonsense, whether it be promoting a product, meeting investors or attending some obscure event. Even a driver of Webber's caliber - a former Formula One driver for Red Bull Racing and a member of Porsche's factory Le Mans team - has to serve his time at the promo events.
Somehow, though, we don't think the Aussie driver minds this particular promo detail. In the video below, Webber attends the Porsche Tennis Grand Prix in Stuttgart. He then takes tennis superstar Maria Sharapova out for a spin behind the wheel of the Porsche 918 Spyder. The level of jealousy at the Autoblog office is palpable.
Take a look below for the video. And as we're super jealous of Mr. Webber, hop into Comments and caption the above photo based on what you think he's saying to Maria. Bonus points if you can work "vegemite" into the caption.

2015 Porsche 911 GTS widens your rear-engined choices

"Porsche needs to offer more versions of the 911" is not a phrase you'll hear uttered often. Not with 15 versions already in the catalog. But with the opening of this year's LA Auto Show, Porsche has introduced four more to bring the total up to nineteen variants. And more are no doubt on the way. What you're looking at is the new Porsche 911 GTS, which has grown from one model in the previous generation to four. Buyers will be able to choose between rear- or all-wheel drive and between coupe and cabriolet body-styles, but either way they'll be looking at a 3.8-liter flat six with 430 horsepower. That slots it in between the base Carrera and the GT3, but unlike the hardcore latter, it can be had with choice of manual or dual-clutch transmission – bringing the available configurations of 911 GTS up to eight. Spec the DCT and you'll be reaching 60 in as little as 3.8 seconds, but the pleasure won't come cheap: prices range from $114,200 for the rear-drive coupe to $132,800 for the all-wheel-drive cabrio, plus another $995 for delivery. But for that much scratch you also get the Powerkit, Sport Chrono package, wider track, lower suspension, Xenon headlamps, Alcantara trim, 20-inch alloys and more all thrown in as standard.

Porsche again staring down another $1.8B in hedge fund lawsuits

The sequence of events from 2007 that began with Porsche's secret attempt to take over Volkswagen, and instead lead to Porsche being taken over by VW, continues to instigate lawsuits against the Stuttgart sports car manufacturer. A group of hedge funds that suffered over $1 billion in losses sued the car company in New York. Porsche had publicly stated it wasn't trying to buy VW, the hedge funds in question were shorting VW stock, and when Porsche's actual intentions were revealed, the stock shot up and the hedge funds took a beating.
The case was thrown out over the issue of jurisdiction, then appealed, only to see another suit filed on top of that. After that, most of the hedge funds withdrew their claims in New York and Porsche offered a 90-day window to refile in Germany where it is already fighting a number of other suits over the same issue. The hedge funds accepted the offer, refiling in Stuttgart for $1.8 billion in damages. According to Bloomberg, Porsche hasn't commented on the refiling, but as the same plaintiffs are involved, it's safe to assume that the carmaker still feels the case is "unsubstantiated and without merit." It has fared alright so far even in German courts, with two lesser cases against it thrown out last year.