2004 Porsche 911 Carrera Coupe 2-door 3.6l on 2040-cars

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Mark Webber treats Maria Sharapova to a Porsche 918 Spyder joyride

We don't much like Mark Webber right now. Part of being a racing driver is dealing with promotional stuff. It's not hard to find a driver that can't stand all this nonsense, whether it be promoting a product, meeting investors or attending some obscure event. Even a driver of Webber's caliber - a former Formula One driver for Red Bull Racing and a member of Porsche's factory Le Mans team - has to serve his time at the promo events.
Somehow, though, we don't think the Aussie driver minds this particular promo detail. In the video below, Webber attends the Porsche Tennis Grand Prix in Stuttgart. He then takes tennis superstar Maria Sharapova out for a spin behind the wheel of the Porsche 918 Spyder. The level of jealousy at the Autoblog office is palpable.
Take a look below for the video. And as we're super jealous of Mr. Webber, hop into Comments and caption the above photo based on what you think he's saying to Maria. Bonus points if you can work "vegemite" into the caption.

This man literally loves a Porsche [NSFW]

Think you know what "auto erotic" means? Think again. Because one man in Thailand has redefined the term. Caught on security camera footage this guy lurks into a garage, looks over both shoulders, evidently misses the camera, drops trou and has his way with a Porsche Boxster. When the tailpipe proved too hot (or otherwise inhospitable), he moves up to the radiator grille and – ahem – finishes up there. Sadly this isn't even the first time we've come across this particular perversion. We'd urge caution before viewing the video, not only because it's not suitable for a workplace environment, but because once you see it, you're bound to repeatedly blurt out, "Why, man!? Why?"

Porsche announces works team for United Sportscar Championship

Porsche is undoubtedly the most successful manufacturer in sportscar racing, and it's only upping its game. The German marque is launching its new LMP1 racer for Le Mans in pursuit of overall victory once again, and now that sportscar racing in North America is coming together under one banner in the United Sportscar Championship, Porsche has announced it is entering the fray with a works team here as well.
The new Porsche North America racing team will field two cars in the entire inaugural season of the Tudor United Sportscar Championship that's been formed out of the former Grand-Am and American Le Mans Series. The team will be based out of the Porsche Motorsport North America facility in Santa Ana, California, and will partner with three-time ALMS LMPC winners Core Autosport in getting a pair of the latest 911 RSR racecars to the front of the GT Le Mans class.
Drivers have yet to be announced, but are projected to be drawn out of Porsche's factory driver program, which includes such talents as Patrick Long, Timo Bernhard, Romain Dumas and Neel Jani. Keep reading below for the official announcement.