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Fastest cars in the world by top speed, 0-60 and quarter mile

A claim for the title of “Fastest Car in the World” might seem easy to settle. ItÂ’s actually anything but: Are we talking production cars, race cars or customized monsters? And what does “fastest” even mean? For years, car publications have tended to define “fastest” in terms of an unbeatable top speed. ThatÂ’s distinct from the “quickest” car in a Usain Bolt-style dash from the starting blocks, as with the familiar 0-60 mph metric. Professionals often focus on track lap times or elapsed time-to-distance, as with a drag racer thatÂ’s first to trip the beam of light at the end of a quarter-mile; or the 1,000-foot trip of nitromethane-powered NHRA Top Fuel and Funny Car dragsters. Something tells us, however, that you're not seeking out an answer of "Brittany Force rewriting the NHRA record books with a 3.659-second pass at a boggling 338.17 mph." For most barroom speed arguments, the focus is firmly on cars you can buy in showrooms, even if many are beyond the financial means of all but the wealthiest buyers and collectors. Here are some of the enduring sources of speed claims, counter-claims, tall tales and taunting dismissals that are the lifeblood of car enthusiasts – now with EVs adding an unexpected twist to these passionate pursuits.   Fastest from the blocks: 0-60 mph Thirty years ago, any car that could clock 60 mph in five seconds or less was considered extremely quick. Today, high-performance, gasoline-powered sedans and SUVs are routinely breaking below 4 seconds. As of today, the 2023 Dodge Challenger SRT Demon 170 crushes all with a 0-60 mph time of just 1.66 seconds. That's simply absurd, but keep in mind the Demon was engineered with the single-minded purpose of going fast in a straight line. It's also important to realize that direct comparisons are difficult, because not all of these times were accomplished with similar conditions (prepped surfaces, adjustments for elevation and so on). The moral here is to take these times with a tiny grain of salt. After the Dodge, the Rimac Nevera comes in with an officially recorded 0-60 mph time of just 1.74 seconds. EVs crowd the quickest list, with the Pininfarina Battista coming in a few hundredths slower (1.79 seconds) than the Nevera and the Lucid Air sapphire (1.89 seconds) right after that. Eventually, you arrive to the Tesla Model S Plaid, which has a claimed 1.99-second 0-60 mph time, though instrumented testing by Car and Driver shows it accomplishes the deed in 2.1 seconds.

What's the deal with comedians and their cars?

'Round about the time in his life when it should happen for all of us, Jerry Seinfeld's ship came in with a force that almost split the dock. He'd been doing pretty well with his observational style ("There's a cereal now that's just cookies. Have you seen this? Cookies for breakfast. It's called Cookie Crisp. Cookies for breakfast! They oughta just call it 'To Hell With Everything!'"). But he showed no signs of setting the world on fire until he got cast in a show that was either about – depending on the level of comedy geek you ask – the average New Yorker, the very worst people in the world, or nothing. Suddenly Jerry Seinfeld was pretty much the center of the comedy universe. And while his comedy was at once both brilliantly innovative and rooted in the mundane, his next move was a predictable grab at something exotic – he went out and bought his dream car. A rather nice 911, actually. As almost everyone knows, it didn't stop there, and the man put together one of the most enviable collections of iconic Porsches we're likely to see. So what's the connection, if there is one, between cars and comedy? As far as Jerry Seinfeld (the man) is concerned, he's probably not the same guy as the Jerry on Seinfeld (the show) although it's hard to say for sure; his public persona is almost unnervingly well managed. But cars and comedy were the constants in his life then, and, well, just look at what the guy does now; Comedians in Cars Getting Coffee is a cultural constant, and we're certainly seeing Seinfeld the man in that one, and cars are obviously still central to his life. And it's been that way with a lot of very, very good comedy guys. Cars seem to round out their lives, to become the yin to their comedy yang. Ernie Kovacs might not have invented visual gags or surreal humor, but he got them both to kill on television in the 1950s, so he's a comedy hero. He died behind the wheel of his beloved Corvair wagon, so he's absolutely some kind of car-guy hero as well. Bill Cosby, the hottest name in comedy for a good long while, had Ferraris, one of two fire-breathing supercharged big-block Cobras (pictured below), and a BMW 2002tii – none of which either contributed to or in any way make up for the profoundly sociopathic creature he turned out to be, but it's still a data point. The Smothers Brothers, who defied the networks and the norms by getting blatantly political before that sort of thing was cool, went sports car racing.

$1.4B hedge fund suit against Porsche dismissed

Investors have canvassed courts in Europe and the US to repeatedly sue Porsche over its failed attempt to take over Volkswagen in 2008 (see here, and here and here), and they have repeatedly failed to win any cases. You can add another big loss to the tally, with Bloomberg reporting that the Stuttgart Regional Court has dismissed a 1.4-billion euro ($1.95B US) lawsuit, the decision explained by the court's assertion that the investors would have lost on their short bets even if Porsche hadn't misled them.
Examining the hedge funds' motives for stock purchases and the bets that VW share prices would fall, judge Carola Wittig said that the funds didn't base their decisions on the key bits of "misinformation," and instead were participating simply in "highly speculative and naked short selling," only to get caught out.
With other cases still pending, the continued streak of victories bodes well for Porsche's courtroom fortunes, since judges will expect new information to consider overturning precedent. If there is any new info, it could come from the potential criminal cases still outstanding against former CEO Wendelin Wiedeking and CFO Holger Härter, who were both indicted on charges of market manipulation.