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This junkyard '91 Grand Am is as hooptie as it gets

I spend a lot of time in junkyards. A lot of time. With all this experience, I have learned to recognize a perfect hooptie when I see one, a car whose final owner got every last bit of use out of it when its value was hovering right about at scrap value. This 1991 Pontiac Grand Am that I spotted in a San Francisco Bay Area self-service wrecking yard a few days ago, from the final model year for the third-generation Grand Am, checks all the hooptie boxes just right. First of all, it's a low-option coupe with the wretched and unloved GM Iron Duke engine, a rattly, gnashy, thrashy 2.5-liter four-cylinder kludged together using off-the-shelf parts from the Pontiac 301-cubic-inch V8 during the darkest years of the Malaise Era and used in cars whose buyers just didn't care. Most of the paint has been burned off by 25 years of harsh California sun, but the car spent sufficient time in a damp, shady spot for lichens to build up here and there. There are skeletons-with-sombreros stencils sprayed here and there, plus a big moonshine-guzzling skeleton mural painted on the hood. Goodbye, property values! Still, someone felt some affection for this car, giving it the name "Good Ol' Snakey" and painting that name on the decklid. We can assume that the Iron Duke was a bit loose by this time, probably leaving a serpentine trail of blue smoke behind the car at all times. So, the combination of cheapness, ugliness, menace, and who-gives-a-damn functionality make this Grand Am an excellent example of a pure hooptie. Within a couple of months, it will be crushed, shredded, shipped out of the Port of Oakland, and reborn in China as refrigerators and Geely Emgrands. Somewhere in Northern California, though, a few of Ol' Smokey's friends will remember this car fondly.

Automakers tussle over owners of 'orphan' makes

When General Motors put down several of its brands in recent years, it also let loose thousands of brand-loyal customers who will eventually need another car.
R.L. Polk Associates estimates there are more than 18 million cars from 16 discontinued makes on the road today. Those "orphan owners" have sales-hungry competitors seeing dollar signs. GM is offering Saturn owners $1,000 cash toward a Chevy Cruze, Cadillac CTS or a GMC Acadia. Ford is giving its Mercury lease customers a chance to get out of their contracts with no early-termination penalty and offering to waive six remaining payments if they drive off in a Ford or Lincoln.
Edmunds.com research shows the efforts are paying off somewhat for GM, with 39 percent of Pontiac owners, 37 percent of Hummer owners and 31 percent of Saturn owners taking delivery of another GM-branded vehicle. But that leaves as much as 69 percent of owners going elsewhere. Ford, Honda and Toyota seem to be attracting many former GM owners.

Florida man runs down bikers in traffic

A Florida biker and his passenger got a nasty surprise when a road rage incident turned ugly on Monday. According to WTSP, Joe Calderazzo was returning from a Veterans Memorial Day motorcycle rally around 5:30 pm with a group of fellow riders. During their ride, the group got entangled with an overly aggressive driver in a Pontiac. Abe Garcia of Tampa watched the silver Pontiac attempt to run the pack of bikers off the road, which started the altercation. The bikers caught up to the Pontiac in stopped traffic, and a shouting match ensued between the bikers and the Pontiac driver. At this point, Garcia pulled out his phone and started recording. The exchange escalated, and suddenly the Pontiac driver floored it, turned hard to the right, and ran over Calderazzo's Harley. The Pontiac mangled the Harley and knocked Calderazzo and his passenger to the ground. The Pontiac then fled the scene. WTSP spoke to Calderazzo as he was on his way to the hospital. "I thought the guy was trying to kill us obviously," said Calderazzo. "You know you don't know what's going through your mind. Is he going to put the car in reverse? Is he going to turn around? Is he going to stop and pull out a gun? You don't know what's going on." The Pontiac driver, a serial traffic offender named Robert Paul Vance, was picked up by police soon after the incident. He is charged with hit-and-run, a moving traffic violation, and aggravated battery. Related Video: News Source: WTSP Weird Car News Pontiac Driving Safety Motorcycle Videos Sedan Navy road rage pontiac g6 Memorial Day veterans Florida Man tampa