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Race recap: 2016 Australian F1 Grand Prix a rowdy start to season

The three brief Formula 1 tests ahead of the current season belied how much had gone on since the last race in November: Infiniti subbed out for Tag Heuer, Renault is back, the all new Haas F1 team, a revamped Manor, three brand new drivers and two returning drivers, a raft of regulation changes among the newly tilled soil. The four engine manufacturers spent a combined 67 tokens among the 138 in the kitty, Renault using just seven of their 32. The only conclusive proof to come from the annual intermission was the otherworldly capability of Mercedes-AMG Petronas. The Silver Arrows didn't even try the super- and ultra-soft tires, focusing on reliability instead of speed. The result? They ran more than 19 race distances, obliterating the lap totals of every other team. There are certainly a few people who enjoyed the complicated new rolling-elimination qualifying format fast-tracked to approval just a few weeks ago. They were wildly outnumbered by those who thought it was awful, including the same team heads who voted for it. We'd probably have to go back to the debacle at the 2005 Indianapolis Grand Prix for an equivalent fiasco when Michelin pulled its teams over safety fears, leaving six cars out of 20 to qualify. In Australia, within 24 hours of the conclusion of qualifying, the new format had itself been eliminated. Nevertheless, qualifying also taught us what didn't happen over the winter: any other team progressing enough to outduel Mercedes. After admitting that he dropped off after winning the championship last year, then getting questioned in the press for some dubious off-season activities, Lewis Hamilton proved he can still turn it on when he wants to. The Brit smoked the Albert Park track in 1:23.837, more than three-tenths of a second ahead of teammate Nico Rosberg in second place. Ferrari did make strides during the off-season, but only enough to keep the same gap it had to Mercedes last year: Sebastian Vettel lined up third, a half-second behind Rosberg, teammate Kimi Raikkonen another four-tenths back in fourth place. Max Verstappen said Toro Rosso is the best of the rest, the Dutchman taking fifth place in front of Felipe Massa for Williams in sixth and Toro Rosso teammate Carlos Sainz in sixth. Daniel Ricciardo – who wasn't smiling after qualifying – kept Red Bull and its new "Tag Heuer" engines in the conversation with eighth on the grid.

Buy a V8 Mercedes-Maybach, or splurge for a V12? Oh to have such problems

There's a certain air that surrounds the Maybach badge, and it's not just the scent being pumped out by the ionizer in the car's glovebox. It's the cream of the crop when it comes to German luxury. These cars are filled with an acre's worth of wood and a herd's worth of cows, ensuring your fingers rarely touch materials as pedestrian as plastic. It's as quiet, as smooth, and as imposing as you think it would be. Though the latest model from Mercedes-Maybach, the S550, might have swapped in a V8 and all-wheel drive in place of the V12 at the heart of the S600, no other amenities have been lost in translation. The car's size gives it a certain presence. Staring at the profile shows a wheelbase that spans two counties, necessitating a microphone and speaker setup simply so that the driver can converse with the passenger – and a Maybach will almost always have a passenger. No one buys a Maybach to drive. You buy a Maybach to be driven. No means of transport short of business-class airline seating offers this much space. Sit back, recline the seat, roll up the shades and enjoy your $167,125 cocoon. But you know all of that already. What you really want to know is if $25,000 - the V12-powered S600 starts at $192,225 - is worth it to gain an extra four cylinders, 74 horsepower, and 96 lb-ft of torque. On paper, no, it's not. The two cars have identical performance numbers, and the S550 benefits from Mercedes' 4Matic all-wheel-drive system. Even with all-wheel drive, the S550 weighs less than the nose-heavy S600. Fuel economy is, as expected, superior in the S550. It's rated at 16 city, 24 highway and 19 combined as opposed to 13 city, 21 highway, and 16 combined. Visually, the two cars are identical save for a few badges. The V12 badge on the S600 is replaced with a 4Matic badge on the S550, and that's where things start to get murky. When you're spending six figures on a car, decisions become more emotional than practical. $25,000 is a lot of money, but there's a bigger difference between $25,000 and $50,000 than there is between $167,000 and $192,000. As stated, you don't buy these cars to drive. Performance needs to be merely adequate. A smooth, torquey V12 is likely preferable to a hairy-chested V8, refined as it may be. These cars will never touch redline, lest the passengers spill their champagne. Plus, that V12 badge is worth its weight in country club memberships. Driving an S550 is fine until an owner shows up at an event behind an S600.

Weekly Recap: Mercedes continues the pseudo-coupe craze with AMG-tuned CUV

But as BMW's X6 has demonstrated, sport sells in in the crossover segment, and Mercedes is giving the people what they want. BMW proved there is a market for crossover utility vehicles designed to look like coupes – as much as a vehicle with four doors and noticeable ground clearance can look like a coupe, anyway. Now comes the reply from Mercedes-Benz: the GLE Coupe. The rakish crossover is a harbinger of things to come from Mercedes, as it begins the company's transition to a new nomenclature and marks the debut of the AMG Sport line. It also continues the recent coupe craze. Designers from many automakers, like Nissan and Volkswagen, have increasingly turned to swoopy, dramatic styling to make utility vehicles and sedans seem more desirable. By revealing the GLE 450 AMG Sport model first, Mercedes is clearly hoping to cast the GLE Coupe as a sportier, lifestyle-oriented alternative in its lineup of beefy crossovers and SUVs. Mercedes used the word "sport," or a variation of it, 53 times in its press release, so uh yeah, it's sporty. It's not an empty promise: Benz means business with the AMG Sport line. This GLE Coupe gets a 3.0-liter biturbo V6 rated at 362 horsepower and 384 pound-feet of torque paired with Mercedes' new nine-speed automatic transmission, and it runs with 4Matic all-wheel drive. Specs on the other GLE Coupe models were not disclosed. But as BMW's X6 has demonstrated, sport sells in in the crossover segment, and Mercedes is giving the people what they want. After all, more than 260,000 people have bought X6s since 2008, and Mercedes wants a piece of that. From certain angles, the GLE Coupe even looks vaguely like an X6. "This is really a vehicle that is all about status," said Dave Sullivan, product analysis manager for research firm AutoPacific. "You can buy a SUV that doesn't have the inherent qualities of a SUV, such as cargo hauling. People will likely be drawn to the looks. Coupes are all the rage." BMW, however, isn't running from the fight, and the updated 2015 X6 is arriving in showrooms this month. It also added a smaller sibling, the X4, to its coupe-crossover stable in July. The GLE Coupe arrives next year, though Mercedes hasn't specified exactly when it will hit showrooms from the factory in Alabama, or specified details on the rest of the non-AMG Sport models. In 2008, it was surprising the X6 was a hit. In 2015, it will be even more surprising if the GLE Coupe isn't.