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Race Recap: Abu Dhabi GP is reversals, luck, leanness and last dances

We weren't sure if Alter Ego Nico Rosberg, the one who flew into Brazil and showed Mercedes AMG Petronas teammate Lewis Hamilton that he knew also knew how to grab an entire race weekend by the scruff of the neck, arrived in Abu Dhabi. In both Friday practice sessions Hamilton showed Rosberg the way. Then on Saturday, Alter Ego Rosberg took over, taking the last Free Practice session and then pole position by a whopping four-tenths of a second over Hamilton. Thanks to the gimmicky and soon-to-be-obliterated spectre of double points, if Rosberg won the race and Hamilton finished lower than second, the World Championship would remain in German hands. Behind Hamilton came the Williams duo, again, with Valtteri Bottas ahead of Felipe Massa. Daniil Kvyat did swell to put his Toro Rosso in fifth, Jenson Button was just as swell getting his McLaren into sixth. Kimi Raikkonen outqualified his Ferrari teammate Fernando Alonso for the third time this year, the pair taking seventh and eighth on the grid. Kevin Magnussen lined the second McLaren up in ninth, Jean-Eric Vergne making the top ten for Toro Rosso in his last race for the team. To be clear, that was the final grid for race: Daniel Ricciardo and Sebastian Vettel had both qualified in the top ten but were sent to the back of the grid when their Infiniti Red Bull Racing front wings were deemed illegal. They'd start from the pit lane, which was still ahead of Romain Grosjean in the Lotus, who took so many penalties for new engine components that he started the race in Turkey. At lights-out on Sunday, well, it was pretty much lights out. That's when Hamilton got the start of the year, bolting off the line so quickly it didn't take him 100 meters to get in front of Rosberg. The Brit took Turn 1 in the lead, then laid more than a second into the German on the first lap. Rosberg kept close, about 2.5 seconds back, but it was Hamilton's race to lose and everyone knew it; barring a reliability issue or the kind of driving mistake Hamilton hasn't made all year, Britain would have its fourth double world champion. Rosberg was left asking his engineer what kind of strategy they might use to claim first place. That reliability issue did come, but it struck Rosberg on Lap 26 when his entire Energy Recovery System failed, robbing him of 160 horsepower and taxing his brakes.

Watch this perfectly nice Mercedes get crushed by a front-end loader

In a world where the YouTube hoax continues to thrive, it's hard to know what to think of this little vid, but here are the facts as we know them: a coupe that looks like a first-generation Mercedes-Benz CLK gets crushed by a giant front-end loader. There you have it.
Our questions arise in the aftermath - we know industrial resource machinery is heavy, but the Benz gets squashed so flat we wonder if someone's trying to play a joke on us. We hear that the white coupe may have been the heavy-equipment operator's foreman's car, but who knows? The on-camera interview seems awfully conveniently placed, yes? See for yourself in the video below and then leave us your thoughts in Comments.

2016 Mercedes-Benz Metris hits US in October, priced from $28,950*

A Mercedes is hardly what we'd call a budget proposition for most, but everything being relative, what's the cheapest Mercedes you can buy in America? That used to be the C-Class, but not at the $40k it's pushing these days. The CLA or GLA start at over $31k, so one of those must be it... right? Keep trying. And the Smart Fortwo doesn't count. No, the most cost-effective Mercedes you can get in America is the one you're looking at here. It's the new Metris van, and it starts at just $28,950 (*plus a $995 destination fee). Joining the Sprinter (which starts at upwards of $35k), the Metris is Benz's new midsize van – filling a niche in between small vans like the Nissan NV200 or Ford Transit Connect and fullsize ones like the aforementioned Sprinter. It's about as long as the Dodge Caravan-based Ram C/V, but narrower, taller and with significantly more payload and cargo space. Mercedes calls it "right-sized," and evidently hopes commercial drivers and fleet operators will agree. Now if you've never heard the name Metris, you were probably distracted by all the glitz and glamor when Mercedes presented four of them at the SEMA show late last year. But that's alright, because it's a new nameplate: it's essentially the same as the Vito sold overseas, where it will continue carrying that same name, while being sold in North America as the Metris. Both cargo and passenger versions will be offered, the latter starting at $32,500 (plus that $995 destination fee). Power comes from a four-cylinder gasoline engine driving 208 horsepower and 258 pound-feet of torque to the rear wheels through a seven-speed automatic transmission. It's also got all the electronic bells and whistles you'd expect from a Mercedes, including fuel-efficiency and safety equipment – but stopping short, of course, of the luxury features. This is not that kind of Mercedes, and the luxed-up V-Class version offered overseas won't be making it Stateside. The Metris is being showcased this week at the NTEA work truck show in Indianapolis, with deliveries set to commence this coming October through a network of over 200 Mercedes van dealers across America, who will offer it alongside the larger Sprinter. MERCEDES-BENZ METRIS MIDSIZE COMMERCIAL VAN MAKES ITS DEBUT AT NTEA WORK TRUCK SHOW - "Mercedes-Benz Metris": The next big thing is mid-sized. - Introduction of the "Mercedes-Benz Metris" nameplate for the U.S.