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2016 Formula 1 Chinese Grand Prix recap: another wild show on and off track

Normally we use this space to provide a lengthy recap of the weekend's Formula 1 race, but we're going to try something different since most folks reading this know what happened at the Shanghai International Circuit on Sunday. Instead, we'll alight on what we saw as the big issues in and around the race. Let us know what you think in Comments. Proper qualifying is back. Thank goodness. It only took a month of embarrassment to fix it. And so is passing! For the third race in a row, big performance improvements at the ten teams behind Mercedes-AMG Petronas and a wider tire selection at this race graced us with opening stints filled with dicing cars. Seeing the McLarens on screen doesn't make us cringe. Manor doesn't only make the global feed when it's being lapped. We've been complaining about parade races for so long that we forgot excitement was possible without rain or wholesale regulation changes. Yes, Mercedes is still the king of the jungle, but there are some other proper midfield beasts on the hunt, too. Malfunctions up and down the grid did help the show in Shanghai, like Lewis Hamilton suffering perpetual troubles, Nico Hulkenberg's runaway front wheel which red-flagged Q2, and Sebastian Vettel's and Kimi Raikkonen's flubbed hot laps in Q3 that let Daniel Ricciardo slip by into second on the grid. Come race day things went all Grand Theft Auto at Turn 1 on the opening lap, sending some of the best cars to the pits. Then came Ricciardo's puncture while leading, then came the Safety Car – all by Lap 5. Nico Rosberg got 38 seconds of airtime on the way to victory – at the start and the finish, and that happened to be his margin of victory, too – otherwise he was a ghost. Everyone else was struggling and juggling. Rosberg's win at the Bahrain Grand Prix put the German at five consecutive victories going back to last year's Mexican Grand Prix. The history books show that any driver who's won five straight contests has gone on to win the championship. With his triumph in China, the German has won the season's first three races, the history books again show that the other nine drivers who've pulled that off have gone on to win the championship. Rosberg, 36 points ahead of his teammate in the standings, is having none of it. He said of the other victors, "But they didn't have Lewis Hamilton as their team-mate." Perhaps Mercedes was right not to make an engine deal with Red Bull last season.

The Mercedes-Maybach Pullman Guard is a limo with a bulletproof vest

As fabulously plush as the Mercedes-Maybach Pullman is, there is a certain class of individual for which luxury is only part of the equation. Oligarchs, dictators, kingpins of questionable businesses, and probably some legitimate world leaders all love luxury, but they sometimes face some hairy commutes that demand a bit more protection. For them, the answer to their luxury car needs is the armored Pullman Guard. The Mercedes-Maybach Pullman Guard tops the line of S-Class Guard models that also includes the Mercedes-Benz S600 Guard and the Mercedes-Maybach S600 Guard. Like the non-armored Pullman it packs loads of leather, seats with practically infinite adjustability, and redundant gauges for rear passengers. It is also by far the longest S-Class vehicle available, stretching more than 40 inches longer than the next-longest Mercedes-Maybach. This tremendous length allows the Pullman Guard to have four-passenger seating in the rear, with two seats facing two others. It's the perfect place to sign treaties or entertain diplomats. Or, if foreign affairs aren't your speed, it would also be a convenient place to carve up territory, issue ultimatums to enemies, and intimidate dissidents. The Pullman Guard was developed alongside the standard Pullman, and because of that, the added armor does not sacrifice interior space. The armor does affect weight, though. The Pullman Guard weighs over 11,000 pounds. But, in return, the steel plates on the sides and floor, non-Kevlar-brand high-strength fabrics, and polycarbonate-backed windows protect occupants from bullets and explosives. Plus, the Pullman Guard features a twin-turbo V12 that produces 530 horsepower and 612 lb-ft of torque to haul the added ballast around. If a recognized authority is ordering a Pullman Guard, Mercedes also offers sirens, flashing lights, two-way radios, an emergency starter battery, and a loudspeaker system. These items are sure to be useful when trying to navigate seas of protestors in the streets. All of this extra protection will cost you though, and if you have to ask, you definitely can't afford it. But we'll tell you the price anyway. A standard Pullman will run around $500,000 at current exchange rates. For the Guard model, be prepared to shell out about $1.56 million. It's a steep price for sure, but for those whose pampered lives are in danger, it's probably worth it.

Maybach Pullman, S550 4Matic coming next

Mercedes-Benz officially revived the Maybach name as a sub-brand with the reveal of the luxed-up S600 at the LA Auto Show last week, but that's only the tip of the proverbial iceberg when it comes to the German automaker's new plans for its uber-prestige marque. Motor Trend reports that Mercedes is planning two additional Maybach variants to launch in the near future, both of them also based on the S-Class. First up, we're told to expect the even longer Pullman limousine to launch, complete with Maybach treatment, at the Geneva Motor Show next March – although this model won't necessarily be offered in America. Whether it will or not, the Mercedes-Maybach S600 Pullman will be even bigger, more luxurious and more expensive than the one just unveiled. What is being planned for US customers, however, is an Maybach S550 4Matic. Mating the 4.7-liter twin-turbo V8 to all-wheel drive would be a boon for wintery upscale markets, and is reportedly a more feasible option than trying to pair the V12 to the 4Matic system. As for other model lines, we've heard rumors of a Maybach GL-Class utility in the pipeline, but have yet to receive any such confirmation. Car confirms, however, that we shouldn't expect to see AMG versions of Maybach models. The two are being cultivated as separate pillars atop the Mercedes range – one focused on performance, the other on luxury – and never the twain shall meet. The previous model line did breed a sportier Maybach 57 S, however, and we wouldn't be surprised to see a similar treatment applied to one of the new models should Daimler find there's demand. In related news, MT also reports that a new S-Class Cabriolet is coming around the corner, and that the G550 is preparing to drop its aging 5.5-liter V8 in favor of the GL's 3.0-liter twin-turbo V6.