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Jaguar F-Type squares off against Porsche 911, Aston V8 Vantage with Chris Harris

Chris Harris is back on the job, taking on really really difficult car questions like: Which enormously sexy and good-to-drive, high-performance convertible is the top of the heap? As one of the hottest cars in the luxury space right now, the Jaguar F-Type S is, of course, in on the action. Competition comes in the form of the Aston Martin V8 Vantage Roadster and the Porsche 911 Carrera S Cabriolet. Sun-loving CEOs who despise test-driving need look no further.
Scroll on below for a fully featured (with a running time of more than 20 minutes) comparison video. Harris does his best to entertain - in a typically nitpicky and made-up-British-words fashion - and the moving pictures are lovely to look at. Kick back, pour a pint and get your weekend started off right.

2017 Jaguar XE

You've seen this movie before. Topple the BMW 3 Series has gone more rounds than The Fast and The Furious and The Transporter combined. But like any good cinematic retread, this time it's different. For starters, the latest installment is a zombie flick. Born from the ashes of Ford ownership and the failed X-Type, the 2017 Jaguar XE is coming to save us from the somnambulant, undead Bimmer. Think Army of Darkness with luxury sport sedans, and you'll understand what we're going for. Okay, the plot is only based on a true story. The reality in the automotive world isn't as dramatic as most car journalists would like you to believe. But the XE is hugely important for Jaguar's desire to increase global production. You're looking at the future best-selling model. It's built on an all-new body structure that forms the basis for all the brand's upcoming sedans. The smallest, most affordable Jaguar also launches with a new engine family, built in a new factory in England. The XE arrives stateside in early 2016 with two available engines. A 2.0-liter diesel from the new Ingenium lineup is the entry-level model. Above that is the supercharged 3.0-liter V6 familiar to the Jaguar and Land Rover lineup. A turbo 2.0-liter gas engine will come in below the diesel at a later date, with an optional manual transmission. The XE versions on launch will offer rear- or all-wheel-drive. Pricing information is yet to be revealed. Until then, just assume the XE will mimic its competitors for price and content. We spent most of our time driving the 35t with R-Sport trim, but check back for a driving impression of the diesel in a few days. As we reported in our prototype drive of the XE earlier this year, this car has incredible steering feel. It's the supernatural aid in the XE's monomyth if any film buffs are still paying attention. The electrically assisted system ranks in the hall of fame with the rack on the current Porsche 911 Carrera. Lightly weighted, the loads build up in the steering wheel like it's wired to strain gauges on the sidewall of the front tires. It's not just good programming that makes the XE steer so well, although that's a big part. The rest comes from the chassis. Jaguar engineers claim the double wishbone front suspension uses lessons learned from the F-Type. The rear part of the car's quick responses comes from a multi-link setup Jag calls integrated link. A body 20-percent stiffer than the current XF also contributes to sharp reflexes.

2013 Jaguar XF Sportbrake

Editor's Note: Our reporter was anxious to get some time behind the wheel of the XF Sportbrake, even though Jaguar only had a very small window available for us to drive it. As a result, we weren't able to capture our usual original images to go with the Quick Spin story. Please accept our regrets, and Jag's lovely stock photography, instead.
The last wagon attempt from Jaguar was the X-Type, built between 2003 and that model line's unceremonious end in 2009. That X-Type and its legacy represent a real dog of a chapter for Jaguar, and for the Halewood factory where the barker was built. It was the final joke told prior to the brand's proper rebirth phase - a phase we're enjoying the heck out of today.
Current magnanimous Jaguar owner Tata can be thanked for this new wagon, the XF Sportbrake. Like all newness coming from Jag these days, this new wagon also feels lightyears more serious an offering, ready to compete squarely with established premium wagon makers across Europe. A Jaguar wagon in America is a far-off priority for the company, frankly. Still we deserve to know what we're missing for the time being from this (sometimes overly) cherished British firm.