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Automotive April Fools' joke roundup [w/videos]

Happy April, everyone. And we all know what this first day of the month means: April Fools' Day. Today is a national holiday for pranksters with the Internet acting as a serious enabler, and it's always fun to see what kind of vivid imaginations exist out there in the automotive world. The abundance of fake news gets a little old as the day rolls on, but we did manage to get in a few chuckles thanks to a handful of major automakers and automotive news outlets that got into the pranking spirit this year
Some of our favorites this year includes Subaru showing what happens when you combine a bunch of rumors, a Corvette some may have already thought was a joke or Honda providing some in-car innovation circa the late 1980s. Honestly, we're still waiting for official confirmation from Mitsubishi that the recently introduced 2014 Mirage is an elaborate April Fools' joke using a failed design intended for the 1995 Geo Metro. We dug up as much "official" OEM foolishness we could find, as well as some of our other favorites, and posted them all below.

Alpina won't sell its 600-hp B6 Bi-Turbo in the US

Like the B5 Bi-Turbo revealed last month, the newest version of Alpina's B6 packs an upgraded 4.4-liter twin-turbo V8 now good for 600 horsepower and 590 pound-feet of torque. The result is a 0-62 time of 4.2 seconds and a top speed of 205 miles per hour, giving it similar acceleration to the M6 but a much higher top speed. Other enhancements include a sport suspension with adjustable dampers, a limited-slip differential, fully retrimmed interior, and an available brake upgrade. These are essentially the same upgrades applied to the Edition 50 that helped Alpina celebrate its half-century anniversary. But with those all sold out, the enhancements will now be available to European customers on the standard B6 – in either coupe or convertible form – starting in the spring, with prices comparing roughly to those of the M6. Unfortunately, the two-door B6 isn't available Stateside, but we can get the B6 xDrive Gran Coupe with the same output. With four driven wheels and four doors, the US-market B6 will rocket to 60 in an estimated 3.6 seconds and reach an electronically limited top speed of 200 mph – if only we had the derestricted highways to test that out. Related Video: BMW ALPINA B6 BI-TURBO WITH UPDATED 4.4 LITRE V8 BI-TURBO • V8 Bi-Turbo producing 441 kW (600 hp) and 800 Nm of torque • BMW ALPINA B6 Bi-Turbo Coupe accelerates from 0 to 100 km/h in just 4.2 seconds • Significantly extended standard equipment A limited number of fifty units of the BMW ALPINA B6 Bi-Turbo EDITION 50 were produced for our customers. Created and developed to celebrate ALPINA's 50th Anniversary in 2015, these vehicles all exhibit unique features sourced from ALPINA's long and eventful heritage. Like limited edition models of the past, the popularity of the EDITION 50 means all examples have been placed with customers. The regular version of the BMW ALPINA B6 Bi-Turbo Coupe and Convertible will continue to be available in spring 2016 and featuring the updated engine and drivetrain configuration. The powerful 4.4 litre V8 Bi-Turbo has been developed further, increasing output to 441 kW (600 hp) and 800 Nm of torque. The BMW ALPINA B6 Bi-Turbo Coupe accelerates from 0 to 100 km/h in 4.2 seconds, onto a top speed of 330 km/h. Combined consumption according to ECE Norm remains at 9.4 l/100km and 219 g/km CO2. The ALPINA sport suspension with Adaptive Drive comprises electronically adjustable dampers and active roll stabilisation.

BMW i wants to build the ultimate self-driving machine

Just a few years into its short life, BMW's i sub-brand is changing its mission from the pursuit of the electric cars to building the ultimate self-driving machine. That's according to Klaus Froehlich, shown above, a BMW board member and the head of research and design. "[BMW i] is now in ramp-up stage," Froehlich told Reuters. "We call it Project i Next." Project i Next won't abandon the electric car model – but instead, its next EV will feature the next-generation of self-driving technology. This is not the first time we've heard of BMW's autonomous aspirations, but it's the first time we've heard of a new name or designation for the brand. According to Reuters, BMW won't sell its next i-badged EV until 2021 – whether that's the oft-rumored i5 or another vehicle all together remains to be seen. Whatever BMW calls it, driverless tech will be a priority. Froelich added that such a vehicle could allow the company to fire up its own ride-hailing service to challenge Uber and Lyft, and their automotive allies, Toyota and General Motors. BMW is still working on its partnership strategy in that realm, Froelich told Reuters, but the company isn't sitting still – it made a small investment in ride-sharing app Scoop late last month. A raft of electric car competitors – Tesla, obviously, but also Porsche and Audi – and the struggling i3 are forcing BMW i's hand. It only sold 11,000 i3s here in the US last year, and with just 2,272 sold over five months, it's on pace to do less than half that volume in 2016. A Chinese electric startup has also plundered the brand's leadership ranks, Reuters said. Bloomberg claims this startup is Future Mobility Co., which is backed by Foxconn (among others). Just five months into 2016, i has lost the head of its powertrain group, Dirk Abendroth, its VP of product management, Henrik Wenders, and the head of the i8 program, Carsten Breitfeld. Considering these woes, changing gears might be i's best option for long-term viability. Related Video: News Source: ReutersImage Credit: John Locher / AP Green BMW Technology Emerging Technologies Autonomous Vehicles Electric bmw i driverless car klaus froehlich