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24 Hours of Le Mans live update part two

We tasked surfing journalist Rory Parker to watch this year's live stream of the 2016 24 Hours of Le Mans. What follows is an experiment to experience the world's greatest endurance race from the perspective of a motorsports novice. Parker lives in Hawaii and can hold his breath longer than he can go without swearing. For Part One, click here. Or you can skip ahead to Part Three here. I write about surfing for a living. If you can call it a living. Basically means I spend my days fucking around and my wife pays for everything. Because she's got a real job that pays well. Brings home the bacon. Very progressive arrangement. Super twenty first century. I run a surf website, beachgrit.com, with two other guys. It's a strange gig. More or less uncensored. Kind of popular. Very good at alienating advertisers. My behavior has cost us a few bucks. I'm terrible at self-censorship. Know there's a line out there, no idea where it lies. I still don't understand any of the technical side. Might as well be astrophysics or something. For contests I do long rambling write ups. They rarely make much sense. Mainly just talk about my life, whatever random thoughts pop into my head. "Can you do something similar for Le Mans?" "Sure, but I know absolutely fuck-all about racing." "That's okay. Just write what you want." "Will do. But you're gonna need to edit my stuff. Probably censor it heavily." So here I am. I spent the last week trying to learn all I can about the sport of endurance racing. But there's only so much you can jam in your head. And I still don't understand any of the technical side. Might as well be astrophysics or something. While I rambled things were happening. Tracy Krohn spun into the gravel on the Forza chicane. #89 is out of the race after an accident I missed. Pegasus racing hit the wall on the Porsche curves. Bashed up front end, in the garage getting fixed. Toyota and Porsche are swapping back and forth in the front three. Ford back in the lead in GTE Pro. #91 Porsche took a stone through the radiator, down two laps. Not good. The wife and I are one of those weird childless couples that spend way too much time caring for the needs of their pet. French bulldog, Mr Eugene Victor Debs. Great little guy. Spent the last four years training him to be obedient and friendly. Nice thing about dogs, when you're sick of dealing with them you can just lock 'em in another room for a few hours. You don't need to worry about paying for college.

2014 Audi SQ5 ditches diesel, still packs a punch

Over in Europe-land, the Audi SQ5 is a diesel-powered monster capable of sending a whopping 479 pound-feet of torque to its wheels. Naturally, this beast isn't coming to the States, but that doesn't mean we're missing out on the whole SQ5 experience altogether. At the Detroit Auto Show this week, Audi is debuting a new gasoline-powered version of the hot crossover, and while it's not quite the oil-burning dreamboat we've lusted after from afar, we certainly wouldn't kick it out of bed.
Instead of a diesel, we get a boosted version of Audi's supercharged 3.0-liter V6, good for 354 horsepower and 346 pound-feet of torque. Running through an eight-speed automatic transmission, the SQ5 will reportedly be able to fire off 0-60 times in the low-five-second range and will top out at an electronically limited 155 miles per hour. Suspension upgrades are on hand to improve road-going prowess, but also lower the Q5's stance a bit, too.
Because this is an S model, there are plenty of visual upgrades on hand, including a more aggressive front fascia, 20-inch wheels and some pretty new colors including Estoril Blue and Panther Black. Interior upgrades like Alcantara trim and aluminum brightwork add to some sportiness from the cockpit view, as well.

Audi S3 Sedan boasts SAE 296 hp, 0-60 in 4.7 seconds

The (technically speaking) 2015 Audi S3 sedan should start at right near $39,000.
The last time Audi gifted the world with a small sport sedan was way back when the A4 wasn't an entry-luxury executive car costing relative gads of dough, so maybe since the mid-1990s. In a company decision reversal, we're now officially getting the new A3 Sportback starting later this year, but that's a five-door hatch and not a big volume attraction for markets like the United States. And there's no guarantee we'll get the S3 Sportback version yet. So, what to do?